The fact that you are worried enough about doing the right thing that you asked for advice on this site tells me that you will do just fine. You’ll make mistakes just like every father before you has. Next thing you know they’ll be grown and you’ll wonder how it happened so fast.
Help: I’m going to be a father
- Thread starter CheapClone1202
- Start date
Agree 100%. You can’t possibly prepare them for what they will deal with in the future because you have no idea what their future will look like. You can teach them how to learn, be curious, and problem solve. Reading to them will do that.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Don’t get caught up in thinking you HAVE to latch onto any parenting trend or get sucked into social media perfect parent bull sh*t. You’ll figure out what works (or doesn’t) for your kid.
Don’t isolate yourself and feel you have to shelter your kid from everything. We took our daughter out into the world almost immediately. By the time she was a week old she had been to the local brewery, seen a live band, been over to a friend’s place to can tomatoes, and attended a parade with fire trucks blaring and marching bands and all that jazz.
Our daycare provider comments almost weekly how obvious it is that our daughter is used to interacting with people and handling social situations.
Lastly, you will screw up. Don’t melt down when you do. Just regroup and love your child and partner best you can.
Don’t isolate yourself and feel you have to shelter your kid from everything. We took our daughter out into the world almost immediately. By the time she was a week old she had been to the local brewery, seen a live band, been over to a friend’s place to can tomatoes, and attended a parade with fire trucks blaring and marching bands and all that jazz.
Our daycare provider comments almost weekly how obvious it is that our daughter is used to interacting with people and handling social situations.
Lastly, you will screw up. Don’t melt down when you do. Just regroup and love your child and partner best you can.
Most importantly - Congratulations! No greater gift than a child
Like your future marriage, everyday is a learning experience of work, commitment, creativity, amazement, love. Celebrate!
Like life, you will get out of your family, what to put into it.
When raising our child, I lived by;
The Work will wait while you show the child the rainbow; but the rainbow won’t wait while you do the work.
Patricia Clafford
Enjoy your futures!
Like your future marriage, everyday is a learning experience of work, commitment, creativity, amazement, love. Celebrate!
Like life, you will get out of your family, what to put into it.
When raising our child, I lived by;
The Work will wait while you show the child the rainbow; but the rainbow won’t wait while you do the work.
Patricia Clafford
Enjoy your futures!
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Yeah guys, leave this guy alone, when it comes to kids he's forgotten more than you'll ever know
Your first and most important task as a father:
I heard a saying once that If your worried about being a good dad, you are already better than 50% of the dads out there.
Congrats! I have a 5 month old. The first few weeks/month the baby is going to basically eat, sleep, poop and cry. Do your best to keep everything non baby in order (house, food, pets etc). Your gf is going to be exhausted from breast feeding if you choose to do that, so anything you can do to help will be appreciated.
Once they hit 3ish month they will start smiling at you and it’s amazing. Our lil guy is now rolling over and loves to babble and giggle all day. Can’t imagine life without him now.
Once they hit 3ish month they will start smiling at you and it’s amazing. Our lil guy is now rolling over and loves to babble and giggle all day. Can’t imagine life without him now.
Congratulations.... it's an awesome ride.
You have parental instincts already. You might not be aware of it yet. Those instincts will kick in when called upon. Those instincts will carry you through all of it. You'll be fine. Don't worry. God Bless.
You have parental instincts already. You might not be aware of it yet. Those instincts will kick in when called upon. Those instincts will carry you through all of it. You'll be fine. Don't worry. God Bless.
I have a 6 and 3 year old. Here are my suggestions, do what fits you:
Read to your kids every day even in the womb.
Say yes more than you say no, so give them 2 choices you are comfortable with.
If you don’t like their behavior, check your self first, they could be imitating you. They are copycats.
Coach them to speak for themselves. They want to respond but might not know how.
Treat them like any other human being. Treat them like you would want to be treated.
I'm not a dad (clearly!) - but I do have some advice, if you care to hear it.
It's been mentioned...hormones are a *****, and they can make your GF/wife be a ***** at times. Don't take it personally.
Change diapers. Assist with feedings - burping inbetween, feeding supplemental bottles at 2am, etc
Help with laundry, cooking, picking up the house, etc, at least for the first few weeks. 95% of her (mostly) awake times will be focused on that noisy, squishy little mess the two of you produced. Understand that it will need her attention more than you do during that time. Remember that you were there for the fun part - you need to be there for the parts that are less fun.
As your child matures and develops a personality remember that every child is unique, and the parenting that works for one child may not work for any siblings that come along.
Above all, boy or girl, spend quality time with your kids. Have tea parties, play catch, teach them to fish - DO stuff together. They will remember that far longer than the toys and electronics you might buy for them.
Be there...even if it's just sitting next to them while they process emotions.
Encourage them to explore, and let them fail. They will learn from it. Don't expect them to be perfect. You aren't. DON'T helicopter.
Love their mother, and love them.
It's been mentioned...hormones are a *****, and they can make your GF/wife be a ***** at times. Don't take it personally.
Change diapers. Assist with feedings - burping inbetween, feeding supplemental bottles at 2am, etc
Help with laundry, cooking, picking up the house, etc, at least for the first few weeks. 95% of her (mostly) awake times will be focused on that noisy, squishy little mess the two of you produced. Understand that it will need her attention more than you do during that time. Remember that you were there for the fun part - you need to be there for the parts that are less fun.
As your child matures and develops a personality remember that every child is unique, and the parenting that works for one child may not work for any siblings that come along.
Above all, boy or girl, spend quality time with your kids. Have tea parties, play catch, teach them to fish - DO stuff together. They will remember that far longer than the toys and electronics you might buy for them.
Be there...even if it's just sitting next to them while they process emotions.
Encourage them to explore, and let them fail. They will learn from it. Don't expect them to be perfect. You aren't. DON'T helicopter.
Love their mother, and love them.
16 years from now you will still be screwing things up and not know what your doing half the time. It’s ok.
Also, don’t get embarrassed if it seems weird or awkward. We had to go to birthing classes for our first. First one there were like 50 couples, we had to introduce ourselves. My wife couldn’t make it so I went solo to get info. When I mentioned my wife couldn’t make it the head lady stopped in silence. Said in 20some years of these, she’d never had a dad show without the mom, I got hammered by her at every class about that and stared at.
Your a dad, be proud of that and just so your best no matter how weird it may be.
Your a dad, be proud of that and just so your best no matter how weird it may be.
A lot of great advice in here, but I would say there is no shame in just surviving till the next day. Parenting is exhausting and frustrating, but it is rewarding. Also things that normally take 5 minutes will undoubtedly take 3x times as long.
1. You no longer exist. Seriously you do not exist. The sooner you understand this the better off you will be.
2. This is going to put pressure and stress on your relationship that you didn't know existed.
3. Kids are durable, but don't dribble them like a basketball
4. Try to keep yourself in shape mentally and physically. You are about to be challenged. Greatly challenged.
5. One product I highly recommend is an Owlet sock for the baby.
6. You don't have to be perfect but be present. Ditch the phone. Kids notice that. Ditch the video games and whatever else takes you out of the moment
7. Kids TV suuuuuuucks
I don't sugarcoat being a father. I did it late in life and it wasn't an easy transition. It is still a work in progress.
2. This is going to put pressure and stress on your relationship that you didn't know existed.
3. Kids are durable, but don't dribble them like a basketball
4. Try to keep yourself in shape mentally and physically. You are about to be challenged. Greatly challenged.
5. One product I highly recommend is an Owlet sock for the baby.
6. You don't have to be perfect but be present. Ditch the phone. Kids notice that. Ditch the video games and whatever else takes you out of the moment
7. Kids TV suuuuuuucks
I don't sugarcoat being a father. I did it late in life and it wasn't an easy transition. It is still a work in progress.
Yeah I’m not balking at my responsibility in this matter lol. There was nothing safe or careful here
