Declining job offer you verbally accepted.

[brianhos]

Has anyone ever had to do this? I got offered a new job last week, this thurs I said yes. No paperwork, no start date. But then Friday I got a counter offer that pays more at a different place, has less travel, more vacation, is a few miles from my house, and seems like it would be fun.

So now do I just completely alienate the first one and tell them yeah, "no thanks?"

This weekend is gonna suck.

 

[Gunnerclone]

Yep gotta do it. Even if they presented you a formal offer you still just do what’s best for you. You never know they might come back and try to blow you away or they might say happy trails. They should NOT be dicks about it.

 

[NorthCyd]

Has anyone ever had to do this? I got offered a new job last week, this thurs I said yes. No paperwork, no start date. But then Friday I got a counter offer that pays more at a different place, has less travel, more vacation, is a few miles from my house, and seems like it would be fun.

So now do I just completely alienate the first one and tell them yeah, "no thanks?"

This weekend is gonna suck.

Yep. It's only been a few days. They'll deal.

 

[AlaCyclone]

Has anyone ever had to do this? I got offered a new job last week, this thurs I said yes. No paperwork, no start date. But then Friday I got a counter offer that pays more at a different place, has less travel, more vacation, is a few miles from my house, and seems like it would be fun.

So now do I just completely alienate the first one and tell them yeah, "no thanks?"

This weekend is gonna suck.

Been there and done that! Just be forthright and honest with the first offer contact you decline and let them know that you really appreciate the offer and would have been happy, but you received an unexpected counter-offer you couldn't refuse. Short term pain but long term gain. I am 100% glad I took the 2nd job I was offered in my scenario (a few years out of college), as it was the Rosetta Stone of my professional career instead of just a job. Hope this helps, and Good Luck!

 

[Deleted member 8507]

Suck it up and work both jobs.

 

[enisthemenace]

Never had to do this, but I wish I would be put in that situation. Is it tough? Certainly. But I think, as others have said, you do what is best for you. Ultimately, that’s all that matters. Do it with tact and humility though, which doesn’t sound like it will be an issue for you since you’re struggling with it.

Good luck!

 

[KnappShack]

Be classy when you decline, but make sure you decline if that's the best move.

I've had to do this a few times. Always seems like job offers come in waves.

I used to feel bad about doing it, but I see the employer-employee relationship as very transactional. I'll work for my employer as long as I want or as long as they want me to. That's really the bottom line.

Employers do what they think is best. You do the same, but don't burn the bridge. Make it a win for you.

 

[SCNCY]

It's never happened to me, but I've heard more recently where some one will accept a job with another company, papers signed and all. But then the current employer will make a counter offer and the employee will turn dowb their potentially new employer.

Bottom line, do what's best for yourself, any company would do the same.

 

[pulse]

I’ve done it just like everyone else has said. You feel slightly bad (for about 10 seconds) because you don’t want them to think you’re playing them off each other, but I’m sure they’ll be cool with it. Take the job you want it’s your life.

 

[MeanDean]

You don't actually have to tell them why you changed to not accepting it. Just tell them your situation has changed or other generic words.

As a hiring supervisor it is a big hassle after you've gone through the whole process then need to start over again. Especially if the list of potential candidates is limited. But it's your life and you have to make the best decision for you. They DO understand that.

 

[jmb]

Only question I have is does it irritate you that the firm that counter offered didn’t start w that offer?

 

[BCClone]

Only additional advice I have is tell them quickly. Maybe they havent tidied up the loose ends with another individual that they liked and can still get them.

If they came to you, then there is zero awkwardness involved. If you applied, thank them, apologize and move on.

 

[Stormin]

Do what is best for you. Don’t explain yourself. Just tell them that upon further consideration you will have to now decline their offer. Nothing is signed. So they have no choice but to accept your decision. You are not the first person to do this. It happens. And anymore you have to look out for your own best interests.

 

[exCyDing]

Absolutely do the right thing for you. 99% of employers are going to understand, and the other 1% are ones you absolutely never want to work for. Do it quick, so they can move on to their second choice, if they have one.

 

[LincolnWay187]

With all the ways companies do people dirty these days you shouldn't feel bad at all. Just be overly apologetic.

 

[Antihawk240]

I am an owner who hires employees all the time. Until I have received notice that the future employee has submitted their resignation to their current employer I do not assume anything. I expect your situation the person who offered you the job doesn't assume anything either.

I do not put much weight into verbals. It seems like I get leveraged 50% of the time anyway. I always anticipate their current employer to counter enough to keep them. If I am willing to hire them, unless I missed something, why would current employer let them go? Good employees are hard to find. SO with that said, be 100% honest with the person you are talking to and fully explain why you are backing out. Some things an owner just cant compete with.

Also, leave yourself an out with the freshly received offer and learn from your mistake. Be prepared for your "sorry but" conversation with employer to come back with a counter to the counter offer. It's stupid. I agree with the person above. When I hire someone my budget allows $X so I offer $X.

Don't lose sleep. The person when you break it to it, won't.

 

[BCClone]

Has anyone ever had to do this? I got offered a new job last week, this thurs I said yes. No paperwork, no start date. But then Friday I got a counter offer that pays more at a different place, has less travel, more vacation, is a few miles from my house, and seems like it would be fun.

So now do I just completely alienate the first one and tell them yeah, "no thanks?"

This weekend is gonna suck.

Tell John Miller to go pound his pudd. No way you can seriously leave CF!

 

[jdcyclone19]

Remember you always gotta do what’s best for you. Don’t sacrifice a great opportunity due to guilt.

 

[Rabbuk]

You will likely alienate the first one regardless of what you do. Once you realize this it's freeing

 

[cyclone4L]

Has anyone ever had to do this? I got offered a new job last week, this thurs I said yes. No paperwork, no start date. But then Friday I got a counter offer that pays more at a different place, has less travel, more vacation, is a few miles from my house, and seems like it would be fun.

So now do I just completely alienate the first one and tell them yeah, "no thanks?"

This weekend is gonna suck.

Don't stress about it. This happens ALL THE TIME and companies are well aware of it.

You have to do what is best for you. ALWAYS.

Just send them an email or call them first thing Monday, so both parties can move on. Depending on the size of the company, the hiring department deals with this situation every single day.