The Onion - Jesus Christ transfers to ISU

[bsaltyman]

I heard when he pops the trey he, more often than not, nails it.

It’s like every prayer that he throws up is answered...

 

[coolerifyoudid]

This would be a dominant backcourt. Also, people are saying we have an inside track to signing Budda to shore up the front court.

Hard pass. Scouting report says he won't fight for rebounds.

 

[DurangoCy]

FYI - he's not hoops recruit and has a 2.8 GPA, which is "plenty good to get into ISU" - LOL. He's an aspiring DJ and wants to get into the student radio station.

Sounds a lot like a young @ChrisMWilliams

 

[BoxsterCy]

Not 6'-10". Do not want.

#N610DNW

 

[BCClone]

He's a chunky one, so yeah, he could bring back the Georges "Old Man Game" rep.

More of old Victor Alexander.

 

[madguy30]

Now if I'm not able to watch a game and someone posts 'JFC' on CF I'm not going to know if something good or bad happened.

Also will he have a lot of followers on Twitter?

 

[MeanDean]

Will cyclone alley have shirts that just say JFC?

"Is This Heaven? No It's Hilton" (Actually someone could do that one for real.)

 

[GTO]

JP has announced the opening of an ISU College of Carpentry, just to accomodate his enrollment.

 

[Remo Gaggi]

Perfect guest for any tailgate. What? We're out of wine? Hold on a sec ...

 

[Althetuna]

Sooooo who from the NCAA is going to tell Christ he doesn't own his own image?

 

[Cycsk]

My God this guy is good!

 

[BoxsterCy]

Heard he can't hit a curveball.

 

[1100011CS]

Heard he can't hit a curveball.

https://cyclonefanatic.com/forum/th...t-transfers-to-isu.256530/page-2#post-7175626

 

[1100011CS]

I'll believe it when I see him on campus.

 

[BoxsterCy]

https://cyclonefanatic.com/forum/th...t-transfers-to-isu.256530/page-2#post-7175626

 

[LivntheCyLife]

Are we still in the mix on Mohammed?

Just make sure you don't put him on the promo poster.

 

[LivntheCyLife]

Man, this thread has been so much better than the actual Onion podcast. Well done, CF.

 

[cyclones500]

This thread has really brought out some great creative humor from the CF members!

Plus here's a carry-over on same topic,from the general transfer thread, by @Cy$:

"Finally, a point god."

 

[Cy$]

Finally, a point god.

 

[CNECloneFan]

Pretty impressive pull given his offer list of Notre Dame, Holy Cross and Incarnate Word

Actually, he is a graduate transfer from Notre Dame...