The other night we had one person take care of the check and everyone else reimbursed them via venmo. The person was completely reimbursed before we got up to leave.
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- Thread starter SoapyCy
- Start date
We split check, not because my wife and I couldn't pay it, but usually its because the people we out with usually want to do split checks. Which is fine. When appetizers come up, it usually ends up on one persons check with the idea that the favor will be returned later. I would like it if people went back to the favor type of system, if you get me this time, I'll get you next.
I have a different issue. My daughter got married about a year ago. When we go out with the her husband's family, both his father and me want to pay the bill. For my daughter's graduation lunch, I went to the bathroom and told the waitress to bring me the bill. I didn't notice when his father went to the bathroom a little later and actually paid the bill in advance. Kudos to him for a very nice move. However, this was our event and they were our guests, so I didn't like it. It's one thing to do it for a random night out, but I think he crossed the line in usurping payment for an event that was specifically for my daughter's accomplishment. It would have been different if he had set up the event as his gift for her graduation, but the FIL and MIL were late additions to our event.
I always try to pay, and do the obligatory refusal once or twice when someone else says , no let me get that. It usually comes out 50/50 in the long run but I don't really keep track. I never expect anyone to reimburse me, then I am not disappointed. 
I agree with you that he was a little out of line by paying for that, but when someone does something nice like that you don't have many options other than to just tell them that it was unnecessary, but appreciated.
Maybe a server can chime in but I’ve never understood why some servers/restaurants complain about split checks. It’s not that much work with POS systems, plus if you have a large table to split that should mean a significant tip, right?
It's been a loooooong time since I was a server, but that was usually my exception. I think that the policy many restaurants have of charging a gratuity sometimes gets messed with when you're splitting checks (of course, I was serving back when restaurant software was definitely not universal). However - our restaurant would give us the option of charging gratuity or taking our chances on a party. I usually opted for taking my chances, as I tended to get great tips.
I have the notion that whoevers kid's celebration it is picks it up. If it would be my daughters, then I would; if someone else then let them decide if we each pay or they are picking it up. Worst is when the wife's brother and his family invite themselves along for a meal with my wife's mom. I will go to pay and the local ones stick me with the whole bill because the MIL apparently told them when she went to the bathroom that it was all on one bill but she never arranges to pay for it. I go up since we invited and end up with twice the bill.
Yea I’d be miffed. Depending on the relationship with the dad I would just ask him next time y’all are hanging out at a BBQ or a tailgate to make it clear when it’s your daughter’s event you’re paying. Agreed it would be different if the family had set it up as a dinner for her accomplishment.
I would try to just head it off now before it becomes a decades long annoyance lol.
In my limited experience in the service industry, talking a few months. People who split up checks to exactly what they ordered were cheaper than those who just split it evenly or didn’t split it at all. Thus tipped less.
Also it is a bit more work and depending on the night any amount of extra work when you got 5 other tables is just an annoyance. Plus it holds up the POS so others gotta wait.
I mean it’s part of the job and it’s not that much extra work but I liken it to an email at 4:55pm that you have to answer before I can cut out for the day or something like that.
I've never been a waiter, but I was thinking this would be the case too. In my experience, those who want to do it this way tend to be on the cheaper side. I don't really care that much about the couple extra dollars I would save by splitting the check this way, but to me, it's not worth fighting over.
Now I’m mad. Thinking about what I typed, that cheapskate BIL has never, NOT ONCE, paid for our meal. I’ve been stuck with his 3-4 times. SOB, figures, he’s a tavern hawk.
I think you literally just answered it the sentence before. Someone took the whole check and people are paying them back. Instead of giving your friend a $20 or whatever, just Venmo them
I think it might be a regional thing, most, if not all, restaurants around here, the server asks if there will be separate or a single check(s), without prompting from the table.
My thing is this, if someone in my house orders the most expensive plate on the menu, I wouldn't feel right having someone else pay for that splurge dish.
Someone above mentioned the "do the obligatory refusal once or twice when someone else says , no let me get that." Sorry I am not smart enough for that game, eventually I am going to come across as the cheap guy or something. Please just let us split the check, I'm a simple man.
My thing is this, if someone in my house orders the most expensive plate on the menu, I wouldn't feel right having someone else pay for that splurge dish.
Someone above mentioned the "do the obligatory refusal once or twice when someone else says , no let me get that." Sorry I am not smart enough for that game, eventually I am going to come across as the cheap guy or something. Please just let us split the check, I'm a simple man.
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One in particular is very generous to service people, but not sure about the others. I'm very curious as to what people try to save money on, but spend then turn around and spend on on ther things.
