**** Your Dad Says
- Thread starter jc4cy
- Start date
Not my dad, but on my wedding day, I was sitting up front waiting for all the processions, my Grandma and Grandpa were escorted up first and sat in the pew behind me. Grandpa taps me on the shoulder and asks "where are you going for the honeymoon?" Just a touch hungover 00 was curious why that was an important question right then, answered "Cancun". Grandpa leans a little closer and says "when people asked me that, I told 'em 'all the way'." A little nervous and just a touch hungover 00 didn't get it right away, and busy-ness of wedding day made me forget about it, but when we got a chance to relax in Cancun and I thought about the conversation, I laughed like heck.
A couple from my dad (God rest his soul):
He was so bright my grandma would call him sonny
He was so smart, in school, instead of 'A+' he would get 'star+'
He was so fast he would sprinkle a little salt on bunny rabbits' tails
Speaking of rabbits, he would refer to their poop as 'smart pills'
This was a common conversation when I was in grade school:
Dad: So MLawrence, what did you learn in school today?
Me: I dunno know.
Dad: Did you climb the stupid tree, fall, and hit every branch on the way down?
My dad was quite the smart ass and would tease one of my aunts relentlessly. His go to line directed towards my aunt was, "Cheryl, but the time you get married, I will be dead." My aunt got married in September 2003, and my dad died April 2000. I mean the guy was so bright he was called sonny.
He was so bright my grandma would call him sonny
He was so smart, in school, instead of 'A+' he would get 'star+'
He was so fast he would sprinkle a little salt on bunny rabbits' tails
Speaking of rabbits, he would refer to their poop as 'smart pills'
This was a common conversation when I was in grade school:
Dad: So MLawrence, what did you learn in school today?
Me: I dunno know.
Dad: Did you climb the stupid tree, fall, and hit every branch on the way down?
My dad was quite the smart ass and would tease one of my aunts relentlessly. His go to line directed towards my aunt was, "Cheryl, but the time you get married, I will be dead." My aunt got married in September 2003, and my dad died April 2000. I mean the guy was so bright he was called sonny.
"when you get out in the real world" was a common line.
I always suspected that coming from someone who had always worked on the family farm and lived within 5 miles of his birth place that he was maybe not the best person to take advice from on "the real world".
10-15 years later I feel fairly safe in saying I was right to be a skeptic.
I always suspected that coming from someone who had always worked on the family farm and lived within 5 miles of his birth place that he was maybe not the best person to take advice from on "the real world".
10-15 years later I feel fairly safe in saying I was right to be a skeptic.
When something really bad happened or something happened that he didn't agree with he'd say "What a revolting development." Said slowly and very seriously.
I did this with my kids when they were younger. And now at social events when we are together, one of us is sure to do it and the rest of us are the only ones who get it.
When he wanted us to show some hustle: "S**t or get off the pot."
When he felt confident something would happen: "I'd bet a dollar to a donut..."
When he felt confident something would happen: "I'd bet a dollar to a donut..."
"(Insert some inhumane chore) builds character"
Nothing, because he's dead. Thanks for reminding me.
Anytime I wanted something.....
Wish in one hand and $hit in the other. See which one fills up faster.
Wish in one hand and $hit in the other. See which one fills up faster.
Haha! Ours was walking beans. And we'd probably walk 300-400 acres of beans as a family each season, herbicides be damned. God bless round-up ready technology.
Why my kids go back to the farm for 2 weeks every summer. They get to work and get some play time with cousins. Wish it was more.
It's colder than a witch's tits.
Morning wake ups: "Rise and Shine, roll-out, up and at 'em!"
Morning wake ups: "Rise and Shine, roll-out, up and at 'em!"
