If you have worn an orange jumpsuit(Johnson county issued)....you might be a Hawkeye....
If you're the top paid employee of the state and your son lives in low-income housing....you might be a Hawkeye
If you have Alfredo Parrish on speed dail...you might be a Hawkeye...
If you ever had sex in a Metrodome bathroom with someone other than your wife....you might be a Hawkeye...
If you you stole someone's credit card to buy things on the internet and then were smart enough to have them deliver it to you...you might be a Hawkeye...
If you ever had your freshman son arrested twice for public intox and still let him play football...you might be a Hawkeye
If you passed out on a bench on campus after doing color commentary for the radio broadcast....you might be a Hawkeye
If you bragged about being bowl eligible only to lose your final home game to Western Michigan....you might be a Hawkeye...
If you admitted that Iowa has good defense, both in sports and in the courts...you might be a Hawkeye
If you have more tattoos than teeth...you might be a Hawkeye.....
If you claimed in one breath that the CY-HAWK rivalry means nothing to you, but demean the Cyclowns with every other breath you take...you might be a Hawkeye...
If you ever had the motto " an indictment is not a conviction"...you might be a Hawkeye
If you ever find yourself agreeing with Tommy from DM...you might be a Hawkeye
If you're the top paid employee of the state and your son lives in low-income housing....you might be a Hawkeye
If you have Alfredo Parrish on speed dail...you might be a Hawkeye...
If you ever had sex in a Metrodome bathroom with someone other than your wife....you might be a Hawkeye...
If you you stole someone's credit card to buy things on the internet and then were smart enough to have them deliver it to you...you might be a Hawkeye...
If you ever had your freshman son arrested twice for public intox and still let him play football...you might be a Hawkeye
If you passed out on a bench on campus after doing color commentary for the radio broadcast....you might be a Hawkeye
If you bragged about being bowl eligible only to lose your final home game to Western Michigan....you might be a Hawkeye...
If you admitted that Iowa has good defense, both in sports and in the courts...you might be a Hawkeye
If you have more tattoos than teeth...you might be a Hawkeye.....
If you claimed in one breath that the CY-HAWK rivalry means nothing to you, but demean the Cyclowns with every other breath you take...you might be a Hawkeye...
If you ever had the motto " an indictment is not a conviction"...you might be a Hawkeye
If you ever find yourself agreeing with Tommy from DM...you might be a Hawkeye
Last edited:
