Yesterday I was buying a 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Walmart,
> for my dogs
> Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus. I was about to check out when a
> woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think, that I had
> an elephant?
> Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I
> didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again,
> although I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last
> time. On the bright side though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened
> in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my
> body and IVs in both arms.
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
> that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply
> eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is
> nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to
> mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with
> my story by now.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
> food had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of
> the parking lot to lick my butt and a car hit me.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was
> laughing so hard! WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.
> for my dogs
> Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus. I was about to check out when a
> woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think, that I had
> an elephant?
> Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I
> didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again,
> although I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last
> time. On the bright side though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened
> in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my
> body and IVs in both arms.
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
> that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply
> eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is
> nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to
> mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with
> my story by now.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
> food had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of
> the parking lot to lick my butt and a car hit me.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was
> laughing so hard! WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.