Friday OT - In-laws
- Thread starter Angie
- Start date
Luckily I get along really well with both her mom and dad. Her mom got me in trouble the other day though when our pup was sick. She (my wife) took it really, really hard, and I was seeking advice/help. Sooo, when she talked to my wife on the phone, she told her, "everyone thinks you need to calm down". This did not go well for me. :twitcy:
After almost 8 years (11 total) of marriage where my wife and I have never been closer than 4 hours from my in-laws we are now 45 minutes away. To say the least, it has been an adjustment. I am hoping this is only temporary, and that is what is getting me through. Not that I don't like them, or anything, but I just don't like being so close. We have had multiple same day calls to meet up for dinner, or can they stop by, etc. One of the biggest things is the "advice" I get on my house and lawn, mind you, I am much more experience with landscaping/home repair as I worked in both fields over the years. I am sure everyone has this type of experience with in-laws. My wife and I have noticed that my responses to them are much shorter than they used to be. I don't know how to fix this, but seeing them so much more often makes it tougher for me to keep my opinion to myself than it used to be.
Oh, it is great we are close to our niece tho, (her brother's daughter). But, he asked us if we wanted to go to Frozen on Ice this coming January, I said I really have no interest, for some reason my wife was upset with my response. Am I wrong to not want to go to Frozen on ice???? Mind you, we don't have any kids of our own.
Oh, it is great we are close to our niece tho, (her brother's daughter). But, he asked us if we wanted to go to Frozen on Ice this coming January, I said I really have no interest, for some reason my wife was upset with my response. Am I wrong to not want to go to Frozen on ice???? Mind you, we don't have any kids of our own.
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I've only met them a few times, but so far so good. I think they're just happy that their low-30's daughter finally found a good guy.
They live in Phoenix so it's nice not having to worry about them always right over our shoulder. Plus, gives me a reason to go to Phoenix & golf in the winter.
They live in Phoenix so it's nice not having to worry about them always right over our shoulder. Plus, gives me a reason to go to Phoenix & golf in the winter.
I'm really lucky to enjoy the company of my mother-in-law (I'm just going to type MIL from now on, it's easier). She and I share a lot of the same ideas, from politics to child-rearing. It's nice not to have to defend my every move and decision to her - I know there are a lot of MILs who are combative and overly-involved in their adult child's life (both sons and daughters), and don't really understand that they are extended family from the minute their child gets married. My MIL also lives on the other side of the nation, so she doesn't have the proximity to meddle, even if she were so inclined.
I get along great with my in-laws. Fortunate that they live close and they watch the kids a lot. No daycare expenses for us. My wife and I dated for seven years before getting married. My father-in-law had a "talk" with me before we were engaged and asked what my plans are, which was to marry his daughter, I just was in no hurry. He was diagnosed with Alzheimer's about three years ago. Sad to see what he is like now compared to the way he was. He turns 80 on Monday. They had a winter condo in Diamondhead, Miss until Katrina went thru that area and wiped out some of their friends' places. They sold it and now stay here year round. We visited them there often around Mardi Gras. Diamondhead is about an hour from New Orleans. After golf there once, father-in-law and I went to Kiln and visited Favre's on The Bayou. Place owned by the Favre family and Brett's dad was bartending. He was fun to talk to and said, "you Iowa boys can drink!" I kinda rambled, but I like my in-laws. Will have known them for 20 years this summer.
We get along great! I golf and hangout with my father-in-law. My mother-in-law does all the cooking for her family so my wife does not cook, at all. I do the cooking for our family. When ever we get together, I do the cooking so my mother-in-law appreciates the break.
I'm much the same way. My in-laws are great, especially my MIL who is literally the nicest person in the world. My wife gets along with my mom well, but butts heads with my dad sometimes. We actually wish we were closer to one of them, we need more free babysitting
I'm much the same way. My in-laws are great, especially my MIL who is literally the nicest person in the world. My wife gets along with my mom well, but butts heads with my dad sometimes. We actually wish we were closer to one of them, we need more free babysitting
For a daughter-in-law, I think you're usually either going to have the most extreme reaction with the mother-in-law. Either you'll really like each other, or you'll really butt heads as you struggle for rights to be the "main woman" for the son/husband. I think it's easier to overall like your father-in-law, but still have occasional struggles, because there's no level of competition.
I love my in-laws, including her brothers and sister. I'd venture to say that the older brother is one of my best friends.
The first time I met her parents, we went to their home for Easter weekend. Her dad is a great story teller. We were talking about fishing, and he told me this story about how he and his big Native American buddy were hunting partridge and knocked one down onto this small pond (in Minnesota). It fluttered around a bit and then there was a swirl and it was gone.
The next day they came back with their fishing rods and he caught a 12 lb northern pike, and his buddy caught a 20 lb one.
I looked him in the eye and said, "That sounds like a classic fish story to me."
Out comes the wallet -- he had an old worn picture of the two of them and their catch.
We are going there this weekend to help them get their garden planted, and work around their yard, as they are both almost 80 and don't get around too good anymore.
The first time I met her parents, we went to their home for Easter weekend. Her dad is a great story teller. We were talking about fishing, and he told me this story about how he and his big Native American buddy were hunting partridge and knocked one down onto this small pond (in Minnesota). It fluttered around a bit and then there was a swirl and it was gone.
The next day they came back with their fishing rods and he caught a 12 lb northern pike, and his buddy caught a 20 lb one.
I looked him in the eye and said, "That sounds like a classic fish story to me."
Out comes the wallet -- he had an old worn picture of the two of them and their catch.
We are going there this weekend to help them get their garden planted, and work around their yard, as they are both almost 80 and don't get around too good anymore.
I dearly loved the first set. My mother died when I was 23 and married for two years, with my second child on the way. MIL became MOM to me. We maintained the relationship fourteen years later even when I divorced their son, but when he remarried his new wife created such a stink that MOM was pressured by my ex to sever ties with me. I still miss her; she died a couple of years ago.
Current MIL has a very different background from me, and a very different outlook on life, and we have very little in common except the fact that we both love her son. I support hubby's close relationship with her, and he has recognized that it's better if he spends quality time one on one with her without me (she lives about 45 min away) than awkward time with both of us. The exception would be family gathering times...but then there are more people to create a buffer for conversation gaps.
Current MIL has a very different background from me, and a very different outlook on life, and we have very little in common except the fact that we both love her son. I support hubby's close relationship with her, and he has recognized that it's better if he spends quality time one on one with her without me (she lives about 45 min away) than awkward time with both of us. The exception would be family gathering times...but then there are more people to create a buffer for conversation gaps.
I get along great with all my inlaws. Not many of them get along with each other but I get along with them just fine.
MIL lives about 90 mins away which works out pretty well. Not a huge commitment to take kids to her or to have her come down and watch them. But far enough away that they don't just show up unannounced
MIL lives about 90 mins away which works out pretty well. Not a huge commitment to take kids to her or to have her come down and watch them. But far enough away that they don't just show up unannounced
My mother in law is great. She is a very nice person who would do anything for us. I can actually talk to her about things easier than I can my own mom. My mom is great too but can be judgmental which can strain her and my wife's relationship at times.
My father in law would do anything for us but has his quirks. He has the social awareness of a toddler so he can be challenging to take places. I cringe every time I take him to an ISU football or bball game just by how he acts around people. He also does a lot of things that aren't legal or ethical which really gets to me. For instance he offered to pay for dinner (he doesn't allow the waitress to take his money so he always takes it to the register). Once we were all in the van my MIL realized she had his wallet the entire time. He walked up like he was paying and then just set the bill on a table and walked out. I went back in and paid for it and apologized. But the kids love him and he would do anything for them so I tolerate it but don't let him get away with that crap around us. Like I said earlier he would do anything for us but is like a 58 year old toddler.
My wife gets along great with my dad. She just wishes he would slow down some and spend more time with his grandkids but they talk all the time.
My father in law would do anything for us but has his quirks. He has the social awareness of a toddler so he can be challenging to take places. I cringe every time I take him to an ISU football or bball game just by how he acts around people. He also does a lot of things that aren't legal or ethical which really gets to me. For instance he offered to pay for dinner (he doesn't allow the waitress to take his money so he always takes it to the register). Once we were all in the van my MIL realized she had his wallet the entire time. He walked up like he was paying and then just set the bill on a table and walked out. I went back in and paid for it and apologized. But the kids love him and he would do anything for them so I tolerate it but don't let him get away with that crap around us. Like I said earlier he would do anything for us but is like a 58 year old toddler.
My wife gets along great with my dad. She just wishes he would slow down some and spend more time with his grandkids but they talk all the time.
My MIL is dead and wife just started getting back in touch with her father after 20 years. It works out, I met her mom once and from the stories I've heard I believe I have it pretty damn good. I don't have to deal with MIL bs and her grandfather loves me.
I have fantastic in-laws. They are wonderful about helping out if/when asked, but not being pushy or overbearing. They live about 90 minutes away, which is the perfect amount for a day trip. The hub only has one brother, and I get along fairly well with BIL and his wife, although his wife can be a little intimidating. I like to think the hub gets along well with my parents - we live in the same town and see them very frequently, plus my dad helps out the hub with farming. My parents are like the ILs in where they will help when asked, and even volunteer to babysit, but aren't pushy or overbearing about things. We also help them out when they need it. My parents and the ILs get along well, too, which is nice during family get-togethers.
Some of my friends tell horror stories of their ILs (MILs especially) and I'm so grateful I get along so well with mine.
Some of my friends tell horror stories of their ILs (MILs especially) and I'm so grateful I get along so well with mine.
I agree, I know that there are some total crazies out there. I know my mom gets a little bit nutty sometimes (sometimes too eager to help), but we're really lucky to not have any crazies. You hear stories about mother-in-laws who essentially want to be their son's wife, and go nuts on the daughter-in-law. :no:
FarminCy, that's nuts that he tried to dine-and-dash!!
This happened about 20 years ago. My in-laws were, and still are, divorced. I was at my mother-in-law's house with my wife at the time to spend the day. While we were there, by wife's friend from high school drove by and saw that we were there, so she stopped by to hang out. They decided to go to town to another friend's house for a little get together. My wife asked me if it was OK, and I said yes, no big deal, I'd just stay there and watch TV, or whatever. While this was happening, my MIL was out for a walk and came back in the back door and slipped downstairs to clean up. During this time, I walked down the hall to the bathroom, and when I came out, there stood my MIL, naked as the day she was born. We both froze and then she got this little smirk on her face and I took back to the bathroom where I spent about 20 minutes. We never talked about this, but I do know that she didn't know we were there yet, since my wife took our car in to town. I always wondered about that little smirk. Even before this had happened, I always, kind of deep down wished my wife was built a little more like her mother, instead of having the more sturdy build like her father. It was always really awkward between me and my MIL anyway, and it was awkward for the next 8 years or so, until she got hit by that bus. I always thought she looked at me funny, but never had the guts to ask her if she was weird or what the deal was.
My father-in-law and I, however, get along great and are really good friends!
My father-in-law and I, however, get along great and are really good friends!
