Hawkeye Jokes

[Cy94]

The Seven Dwarfs were marching through the forest one day they fell in a deep, dark ravine. Snow White, who was following along, peered over the edge of the steep chasm and called out to the fallen dwarfs. From the depths of the dark hole a voice returned, "The Hawkeyes are going to beat the Cyclones." Snow White thought to herself, "Thank God... at least Dopey's survived!"

You're trapped in a room with an angry grizzly bear, a hungry Lion, and a Hawkeye fan . You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?

Shoot the Hawkeye fan… twice.

 

[CyFrnzy]

Why is Iowa’s football field artificial turf and not real grass?

So the cheerleaders won’t graze.

What do you call 20 Iowa fans laying on the lawn?

Fertilizer.

What is the most common phrase used by a former Hawkeye football player?

Would you like fries with that?

A Hawkeye football player was almost killed yesterday in a tragic horse back riding accident. He fell from the horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the horse.

And finally...If three Iowa Hawkeye football players are in a car, who is driving?
The police officer.

 

[Cypwr]

I'd rather drink hawkeye than be a hawkeye because I'd rather be wasted than be a waste.

 

[CyPlainsDrifter]

Q: What's the difference between a hawkeye and a bucket of $h1t?

A: The bucket.

 

[CycloneNorth]

Q. What did the average Hawkeye football player get on their ACT?

A. Drool

Q. Why doesn't Iowa have ice in their cafeteria?

A. The kid who knew the recipe graduated.

 

[Bret44]

Not really a joke, but it is a classic:

I'm an *******,
I'm an *******,
I'm an ******* 'til I die,
But I'd rather be an *******
Than a goddamned hawkeye!

 

[DhaCheann]

so you go directly for Miss Iowa.. well played

 

[i4cy]

What do you call 10,000 hawkeye fans at the bottom of the sea ?

A Good Start !

 

[Pitt_Clone]

Photoshopped. This is clearly the original.

 

[Al_4_State]

Coming to CycloneFanatic for clever jokes is like going to a WoW forum for sex advice.

 

[KFitzy87]

Coming to CycloneFanatic for clever jokes is like going to a WoW forum for sex advice.

You sound so experienced

 

[CYCLNST8]

How do you save a hok fan from drowning? Take your foot off their head.

 

[cyman1189]

*You have to be convincing with the first part to really get some laughs*

Be looking at phone as if you are checking twitter or some news source and jsut exclaim

"Oh my god guys... did you hear the U of I library burned down earlier today!?!?!"

after some shocked remarks like, OMG REALLY!?!?! NO WAY!!! THAT SUCKS!!!

answer back with a clever "Yea I have no idea how they are gonna replace 40 million dollars worth of coloring books!"

Laughter ensues, you are a genius and ladies will love you... (cant guarantee any of what i jsut mentioned)

 

[cyman1189]

also recent favorite is...

I cant stand my new DVR... Been trying to record Iowa Football games all week but all it does is keep recording worlds dumbest criminals

 

[Al_4_State]

Are we really mocking Iowa for dumb arrests?

coughGARYLATTIMERcough

 

[nhclone]

Are we really mocking Iowa for dumb arrests?

coughGARYLATTIMERcough

I don't get it, who's Gary Lattimer?

 

[VeloClone]

I don't get it, who's Gary Lattimer?


Apparently a career criminal...

 

[Cycl1]

Their parenting skills!!!.... wait, i dont think i am doing this right.

 

[isulive2train]

What did the Iowa FB player get for Christmas?













Rhabdo.

 

[Amesboy]

Need some creative Iowa State kicks Iowa's *** pictures to post on my FB page. Anybody got anything.