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Favorite quotes.

“Well, Rickey’s not one of them, so that’s 49 percent right there.”
- Rickey Henderson, when asked if he thought the estimate that 50 percent of MLB players were taking steroids was accurate
 
"Supermodels are beautiful girls, Will. A beautiful girl can make you dizzy, like you've been drinking Jack and Coke all morning. She can make you feel high full of the single greatest commodity known to man - promise. Promise of a better day. Promise of a greater hope. Promise of a new tomorrow. This particular aura can be found in the gait of a beautiful girl. In her smile, in her soul, the way she makes every rotten little thing about life seem like it's going to be okay. The supermodels, Willy? That's all they are. Bottled promise. Scenes from a brand new day. Hope dancing in stiletto heels"
 
"All you have to decide is what to do with the time given to you"
-Gandalf the Grey




....or something like that
 
Creek Johnson: Where's Wyatt?

Doc: Down by the creek....walkin' on water
 
Simpsons:
Jasper (as substitute teacher): "Talking out of turn...that's a paddling. Looking out the window...that's a paddling. Staring at my sandals...that's a paddling. Paddling the school canoe...ooh, you better believe that's a paddling."
 
Arrested Development:

Tobias: Take me to the Gothic Castle
Cab Driver (in britsh accent): the Gothic *******?
Tobias: That's what I said... the Gothic Castle
Tobias: I'm here for the magic!

Michael Bluth: [looking at a gift basket Michael received] Didn't you get one of those, too? You bought Lindsay at the same auction.
Tobias Fünke: I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run if you will, so I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.
Michael Bluth: There's so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.
 
For those golfers out there: "Three putting is a lot like jerking off, you're not proud of it, but you know you will be doing it again."
 
For the time being I stopped writing...there's already too much truth in the world, an overabundance that apparently cannot be consumed.

- Otto Rank
 
A couple of mine:

I put no stock in religion. By the word religion I have seen the lunacy of fanatics of every denomination be called the will of God. I've seen too much religion in the eyes of too many murderers. Holiness is in right action, and courage on behalf of those who cannot defend themselves, and goodness. What God desires is here [points to Balian's head] and here [points to Balian's heart] and what you decide to do every day you will be a good man...or not.
- Kingdom Of Heaven

We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different.
- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
 
"If I’d asked people what they wanted, they would have asked for a better horse"

Henry Ford
 
You don't have to eat the whole turd to know it's not a crab cake. - The book Shadow of the Hegemon by Orson Scott Card
 
bumping your own thread huh credit wh0ar

These are my awards, Mother. From Army.

The seal is for marksmanship, and the gorilla is for sand racing. Now if you'll excuse me, they're putting me in something called Hero Squad.
Click to expand...

i think we all know who coined this gem
 
There are two types of people in this world; those that divide people into two groups and those that don't.


There are 10 types of people in this world; those that understand binary and those that don't.

There are two types of people in this world; those who can do math, those who can't, and those who don't care.
 
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