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isuno1fan said:
I forgot to add:

If you have kids, make sure and get them vaccinated on schedule please :smile:

(couldn't resist)
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Make sure to have them spayed and neutered. Or is that pets? I can never remember.
 
mtowncyclone13 said:
How can these articles say it increases stress, anxiety, and does not increase happiness when all we hear from CF and other places how wonderful children are? Either people are lying to the researchers (which I doubt) or they are putting on a happy face to the world they know - too ashamed to be honest.
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You can find information going both directions:

Parents are happier people: Parents experience greater happiness and meaning in life than nonparents, psychologists find

Parents

Just because you're happy doesn't mean you're not stressed, and vice versa. People in high-stress jobs can be happy, just as people can be who aren't stressed. There are obvious intrinsic frustrations to having children - they are rarely convenient. But each one is amazing.
 
mtowncyclone13 said:
How can these articles say it increases stress, anxiety, and does not increase happiness when all we hear from CF and other places how wonderful children are? Either people are lying to the researchers (which I doubt) or they are putting on a happy face to the world they know - too ashamed to be honest.
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My guess is that the people surveyed handle it worse than the people on CF or they just want to vent.... Though I am sure there are many stressful and sad situations being a parent. Honestly, I didn't even get to parent (yet) and I'm still giddy over the time I had. Even though I still have days when I want to cry or ask why....I am doing okay and still am a happy person.

Though I like Angie's answer a lot too.
 
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mtowncyclone13 said:
How can these articles say it increases stress, anxiety, and does not increase happiness when all we hear from CF and other places how wonderful children are? Either people are lying to the researchers (which I doubt) or they are putting on a happy face to the world they know - too ashamed to be honest.
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Some are not being honest with themselves.
 
Angie said:
As someone who had to do IVF to get pregnant, I understand what you're saying, and adoption would have been our next step if IVF hadn't worked. But adoption is a long, strenuous process these days, too - you have to go through psychological and home evaluations, medical evaluations, etc. It is incredibly expensive, especially domestic adoption - and it takes years in most situations. While I understand the need to make sure this poor child is going into a good home, it makes the process very daunting. And many people want to explore every avenue of having their own biological offspring - that's not wrong, it is just their choice.
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I think you could have made your point without needlessly bringing up these kids' financial situation. Stay classy.

:rolleyes:


:jimlad:
 
00clone said:
I think you could have made your point without needlessly bringing up these kids' financial situation. Stay classy.

:rolleyes:


:jimlad:
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I know you're using Jimlad, but I really should have said "unfortunate!"
 
mtowncyclone13 said:
This is exactly the point I was trying to make. For example, "My car breaks down every week, it eats gas, it forces me to never eat out or go on vacation because the repair costs are so high, and it takes up the entire garage so I had to get rid of all my other toys, BUT I LOVE MY CAR!" As a non-parent this is exactly how it sounds to me and I'm not trying to be cynical. Why do people complain about getting up at 4 AM every morning and then beg me to have a kid saying how wonderful it is.

On another note, both my sister and I were adopted by our parents who were in their late 30's at the time. My wife was born when her parents were in their late 30's as well. Having what we had growing up will be impossible on the salaries we make now and we want our kids to have the lives we did - that's why I'm concerned about money. And because I am adopted I see that as a 100% viable choice if a couple is infertile so I get upset when people claim adopted children, "just aren't the same".
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I think that a human life is fundamentally different than a car, making it worthwhile even if it does eat into all your other time. I'm not married and don't have kids, but it just sounds false to compare raising a child to owning a car. On the surface you can add up the costs and benefits and maybe you could say it's better not to have kids. I think having a kid is an intangible that you can't objectively measure.
 
It's kind of like people with tattoo's. Some love them and have a bunch, some are too prideful to admit they are a mistake, and some are honest and admit they were not a good idea for them.

Another way that they are like tattoo's is that a lot of people who have them want to talk about them all the time and get angry when you don't have the love for them like they do.

Another way they are like tattoo's is that they can turn out really good or you can end up being a 60 year old with dolphin tramp stamp.
 
carvers4math said:
Has to be an improvement. I'll promise my vote if you promise no robo-calls.
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You absolutely have my word. Nor will I have people call fifteen times after 8:30, especially if you have children who are trying to go to sleep. That drives me nuts.
 
^^^Better wait on the ringer until Wed. They call to turn out your vote even though you voted 12 hours earlier (or in my case, in September).
 
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