Favorite quotes.

i have never pooped a 10 pound turd, but i would tell everyone if i did.
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Touche
 
from Fired Up!:

Nick Brady: [Nick and Shawn cooking and watching TV in the kitchen] Oh look at that hottie, I wonder what she wants to do with her life.
Shawn Colfax: What?
Nick Brady: You know how Bianca wants to go to cooking school and Silvi wants to be a pilot... and... Oh my god, I actually know these girls, as like friends, and I care? I'm becoming a fully formed person with like sensitivity and empathy! HAHA! alright i'm a person!
[looks at the woman in a bathing suit on TV]
Nick Brady: oww look at the pooper on that one! I could rest my beer on that ****.
Shawn Colfax: And you're back.


and

Coach Keith
: [seeing the Tigers doing the Fountain of Troy] That's prohibidado. I told them in Spanish, how much clearer could I have been!
 
Only the guy who is not paddling has time to rock the boat.
 
This might get me banned but oh well

Procrastination is like masturbation, it's all good till you realize you're just ******* yourself
 

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