I really think there are only 2 (maybe even just one) conferences you can blame for how big of a mess this became: Pac-12 and SEC.
-I think the Big Ten legitimately just wanted to eliminate it's quirky 11-team make up once and for all and didn't really intend for things to blow up like they did.
-The Big 12 has only reached out to new teams when necessary and has never been an aggressor.
-The ACC sort of looks like a bad guy, but I think adding Syracuse and Pitt was done out of fear that it was only a matter of time until the SEC came after 2 of their teams to make it 16. I don't think they are really all that different from the Big 12.
I still don't get why the SEC bothered to entertain A&M's interest at all. They are already the most "national" of all the conferences because of all their success this decade. I think if they wanted to launch a "SEC Network" they could do it easily, but they don't even appear to be considering that.
The real obvious villian thought is Larry Scott who really seemed to cause a lot of the instability during both of the re-alignment crisises.
There are no good guys or villians in this whole thing. Just schools and conferences looking out for their own best interests.
Larry Scott did the job he was hired for. So did Mike Slive. And Chuck Neinas, for that matter. All three men found schools that were unhappy in their current conference alignment, and offered them an alternative.
You can't blame the SEC for taking Big 12 members any more than you can blame the Pac 12 or the Big 10. It's not like these conferences wrecked a happy marriage; the problems existed long before conference realignment.
You want to blame somebody for this? Blame the fans. It's their attendance, their attention, that drives the money making all of this happen. If college football was as popular as college wrestling, this wouldn't be happening.