Daily since losing my dear wife to cancer in 2020.
Death
- Thread starter AltoonaFish
- Start date
Pretty regularly, but not in a negative, fixation kind of way.
When my mind wanders, one thing it tends to drift towards is "how will I respond if ____ dies early?". It could be my wife, daughter, brother, friends, parents, other relatives, whatever. I sort of run myself through what things I would need to do or take on (particularly in regards to my wife and my parents), so if that day comes, I'm not just flailing.
It sounds kinda morbid, but I hate being caught flat footed by a surprise event, and there really isn't anything that can do this quite the same way death does.
I also have a lot of experience with untimely death. 3 of my first cousins (same side of the family) died before they were 17. 2 of them were brothers who were never alive at the same time. I was very close to both as they lived just down the road from me and our dads (brothers) farmed together, so we saw each other almost daily. The third one had a rare brain cancer. All of these occurred before I was 22, and had a really powerful formative influence on my life. You just end up looking at death a little differently after experiencing stuff like that.
When my mind wanders, one thing it tends to drift towards is "how will I respond if ____ dies early?". It could be my wife, daughter, brother, friends, parents, other relatives, whatever. I sort of run myself through what things I would need to do or take on (particularly in regards to my wife and my parents), so if that day comes, I'm not just flailing.
It sounds kinda morbid, but I hate being caught flat footed by a surprise event, and there really isn't anything that can do this quite the same way death does.
I also have a lot of experience with untimely death. 3 of my first cousins (same side of the family) died before they were 17. 2 of them were brothers who were never alive at the same time. I was very close to both as they lived just down the road from me and our dads (brothers) farmed together, so we saw each other almost daily. The third one had a rare brain cancer. All of these occurred before I was 22, and had a really powerful formative influence on my life. You just end up looking at death a little differently after experiencing stuff like that.
Fairly often, my own, loved ones, etc.
I don't have any life changing advice, I just try to make a conscious effort to not let the future ruin the present as much as possible.
I don't have any life changing advice, I just try to make a conscious effort to not let the future ruin the present as much as possible.
I probably think about how I want people to react/feel about my death more than me being dead.
I want people to know that I cared about animals, I didn't stop thinking about the miscarried babies we had, that I implored people to donate blood, that I would open doors for people. That kind of stuff.
I want people to know that I cared about animals, I didn't stop thinking about the miscarried babies we had, that I implored people to donate blood, that I would open doors for people. That kind of stuff.
It's a time thing also.
One day you're say 26 and in what seems the blink of eye you're seventy a million.
One day you're say 26 and in what seems the blink of eye you're seventy a million.
I'm an older parent with a 3 and 5 year old.
I think about death daily and with a different perspective
I think about death daily and with a different perspective
In my line of work I am talking to people about death every single day, and I'm routinely meeting with people who aren't far from death. My takeaway is how comfortable most people get with the thought of dying as they age, or as they are faced with a serious illness.
For me, the thought of death constantly terrifies me. I'm much with you-- I'll lay in bed and think about missing my kids grow up, etc. But I think that for those people who are confronted with death, they seem to find a way to find peace and that makes me feel better.
For me, the thought of death constantly terrifies me. I'm much with you-- I'll lay in bed and think about missing my kids grow up, etc. But I think that for those people who are confronted with death, they seem to find a way to find peace and that makes me feel better.
I think about it but honestly my life has been such a grind for a while now it would be a release. I don't fantasize about it but I don't really know if I'll be able to retire and honestly death is the goal in that environment.
For me everything dies so it's not really something I concern myself with. It sure does give you a rush when you have a near death experience though.
For me everything dies so it's not really something I concern myself with. It sure does give you a rush when you have a near death experience though.
I’m not trying to stir up a religious discussion but as a Christian, I do think about death often but it’s from a positive perspective. I believe the best is yet to come after I die. I love my life and want to share it with my wife, children, and grandchildren for many more years but if not, I have a perfect Heavenly home awaiting me.
Death has been a constant for the past thee years in my family. I was talking with a cousin, that called last night about my SIL visitation, and he stated, "boy you are on a bad streak." It really seems like we get over one passing and then 3/6 months someone else passes. One expects this from older parents, but not at 50 and younger. None of our passings were by accidents, they just died for a variety of reasons. Have to say, its starts to wears on a person.
I used to think about it a lot. But I lean back on my faith, trust there is more to this than just our life on earth. I also try and spend as much time as I can with my kids, wife, friends, and extended family. I let everyone know what they mean to me. Be the best person I can for the people I care about. Don't take things for granted.
I saw a lot of people saying life hasn't been the same since 2020 and they feel like they are not living it.. I disagree... It taught me to live life and not let it pass me by.
I saw a lot of people saying life hasn't been the same since 2020 and they feel like they are not living it.. I disagree... It taught me to live life and not let it pass me by.
For instance, I wonder if each day with my wife’s cuddly now almost 15 year old mini-dachshund will be the last.
I was talking with our funeral home director yesterday, and asked him "how many funerals they are doing in a week?" He owns three funeral homes in Wayne and Appanoose counties, a monopoly in that part of the state. He stated that the industry was slowing down because effects of covid. He said that so many older people died during that time span, that it caused a ripple effect in the industry, and because of it, they are having fewer services now.
I've been close to death. Crosses my mind daily. What I can do, if anything, to stay in the game longer. How appreciative I am each day to have another day. Historically, it was uncommon to live past 60. The way I see it, once you're past 60, you're in bonus time, reason for thanks.
I had a terrible fear of it when I was young, even though I knew it was likely decades away. I feel like over the years I've gradually come to a more logical view: Everyone who has ever lived has died, and there's nothing I can do about it. Might as well have a lot of fun and drink as much beer as possible while I'm here!
I can't remember what show it was, but someone said, "You're not afraid of dying. You're afraid of losing the habit of living." Weird thought, but interesting.
I can't remember what show it was, but someone said, "You're not afraid of dying. You're afraid of losing the habit of living." Weird thought, but interesting.
