Toxic work environment

[loyalsons4evertrue]

I am salaried. The nitpicky things just add up when I see so many colleagues being on mute throughout the day...and I don't give a crap that they are. I just re-looked at their Glassdoor reviews and oof I should have done that more than just when I needed a job...but...I needed a job. The reviews of the company could basically be written by me. People quitting because of HR and manager issues, being overworked, etc.

you'd think some companies with a high turnover rate would look internally and diagnose the issue(s) but some of them are too egotistical to do that

 

[cyclone13]

you'd think some companies with a high turnover rate would look internally and diagnose the issue(s) but some of them are too egotistical to do that

+1. I have seen similar situations in the past: sign of horrible leadership.

What eventually it leads to is they will have frequent job openings and that's a huge redflag. I recently saw a position that was open several months ago and the same role is still open today. My recruiters told me to avoid that company due to its notoriety.

 

[trevn]

If I learned anything in this thread is that sometimes it pays to have a case of the Mondays.

 

[FarmerCy1]

Just schedule yourself for a meeting so that the status indicator is set to Busy. Call it networking or something. One of my supervisors used to do that on Fridays, it just meant he had left for the bar.

Teams usually still goes yellow even if you do that. I used to set up conference calls with myself, call into them and walk away (it shows you as active still, just in a conference call) or put a pocket knife on the spacebar button so it just held the button down and kept me green.

 

[MeowingCows]

Side note. My manager actually teared up when I put in my two weeks. I honestly think it's because she may know her behavior wasn't great, and they are now pretty fuckeredd losing me immediately. There are four others there with my job title and my ten clients now have to have immediate support. A company of 50 and I was there 8 months. And in that eight months, 19 people left.

That right there tells you all you need to know, #20.

 

[cyfanbr]

Teams usually still goes yellow even if you do that. I used to set up conference calls with myself, call into them and walk away (it shows you as active still, just in a conference call) or put a pocket knife on the spacebar button so it just held the button down and kept me green.

You guys are way overthinking this… you can literally click on your status on microsoft teams and set it to whatever you want, then it stays that way. May even give you options for how long to keep that status.

 

[Cloned4Life]

You guys are way overthinking this… you can literally click on your status on microsoft teams and set it to whatever you want, then it stays that way. May even give you options for how long to keep that status.

Mine still goes yellow when screensaver comes on... I am in tech and embarrassed to ask what I am doing wrong

PS. @dahliaclone - happy you got out of that. Cannot imagine having a manager (or company) like that.

 

[gocy444]

I had a sales manager ask me if I could take less paternity leave because our team was going to come up short of our monthly number and they needed me back. I left a few months later.

 

[kirk89gt]

Side note. My manager actually teared up when I put in my two weeks. I honestly think it's because she may know her behavior wasn't great, and they are now pretty fuckeredd losing me immediately. There are four others there with my job title and my ten clients now have to have immediate support. A company of 50 and I was there 8 months. And in that eight months, 19 people left.

That tells you everything you need to know about where you were working……..

Good for you!…...sounds like things are working out for the better……

As an HR professional (with over 20 years of doing this) reading this thread, I get there are good and bad eggs in every profession. My words of caution…….please don’t judge / stereotype us (HR) based on the worst example(s)you have experienced. I have been pretty blessed to work for companies that value its employees and their HR teams are wired as such. Does that mean we don’t hold leaders accountable? Does that mean we shy away from difficult conversations? No, but how you go about it, matters.

And FWIW, there is a huge systemic issue in business with people getting put into leadership roles that have no business being there and companies not equipping them to be successful.

Taking steps to correct and fix this can get you to a point where this thread becomes irrelevant as these situations don’t happen or certainly don’t happen as much.

 

[dahliaclone]

That tells you everything you need to know about where you were working……..

Good for you!…...sounds like things are working out for the better……

As an HR professional (with over 20 years of doing this) reading this thread, I get there are good and bad eggs in every profession. My words of caution…….please don’t judge / stereotype us (HR) based on the worst example(s)you have experienced. I have been pretty blessed to work for companies that value its employees and their HR teams are wired as such. Does that mean we don’t hold leaders accountable? Does that mean we shy away from difficult conversations? No, but how you go about it, matters.

And FWIW, there is a huge systemic issue in business with people getting put into leadership roles that have no business being there and companies not equipping them to be successful.

Taking steps to correct and fix this can get you to a point where this thread becomes irrelevant as these situations don’t happen or certainly don’t happen as much.

I've had fantastic HR professionals at past jobs. This just...wasn't one of them.

 

[BryceC]

That tells you everything you need to know about where you were working……..

Good for you!…...sounds like things are working out for the better……

As an HR professional (with over 20 years of doing this) reading this thread, I get there are good and bad eggs in every profession. My words of caution…….please don’t judge / stereotype us (HR) based on the worst example(s)you have experienced. I have been pretty blessed to work for companies that value its employees and their HR teams are wired as such. Does that mean we don’t hold leaders accountable? Does that mean we shy away from difficult conversations? No, but how you go about it, matters.

And FWIW, there is a huge systemic issue in business with people getting put into leadership roles that have no business being there and companies not equipping them to be successful.

Taking steps to correct and fix this can get you to a point where this thread becomes irrelevant as these situations don’t happen or certainly don’t happen as much.

I mean no offense but when times are good at a company HR is pretty benevolent and you hardly notice them.

When times get tight it generally switches to the exact opposite.

For the record I don’t blame them, that’s the job.

 

[Buster28]

I got out of what used to be a great job (until it wasn't) at Iowa State. Had been there 22 years, 15 at that particular department. When I realized what they were trying to force me into (by my supervisor with the support of HR, in spite of it being deemed medically detrimental by my physician and a therapist), I had to make the decision to leave. It just wasn't worth it. I'd lost 30 pounds from stress and was falling into a depression over the situation. We talked at home and I had full support to do whatever I had to do to save my sanity. I got on family health insurance, so I pulled the trigger. After a snotty email from my supervisor DEMANDING that I submit to her because "I'm your supervisor and you have to do what I tell you", and my returning from a meeting with someone in the OEO that was my last grasp at stopping them (that ended with another dead end), I responded to the email. "This is my two-week notice. My last day will be September 22." That was it. Took an hour for her to cobble together an insincere "I'm sorry to hear that..." But DAMN it felt good to hit 'send' on that email. Did I have to take a big pay cut with what I found next? Yes. Was it worth it? Yes. Without question. A bad work environment with an incompetent supervisor and indifferent HR are simply not worth it. Let someone else deal with it. I have no advice other than to say I honestly hope you find something -ANYTHING- else so you can get out of there. It's just not worth it to try and stay when you know things won't get better.

 

[cyfanbr]

Mine still goes yellow when screensaver comes on... I am in tech and embarrassed to ask what I am doing wrong

PS. @dahliaclone - happy you got out of that. Cannot imagine having a manager (or company) like that.

Even if you set it for a length of time? Most of my experience is egging myself to appear offline when I am checking on things on my day off and don’t want people to see me online, but pretty sure I’ve done it to show busy as well.

Are you able to change the sleep settings on your work computer? I assume not.

 

[kirk89gt]

I mean no offense but when times are good at a company HR is pretty benevolent and you hardly notice them.

When times get tight it generally switches to the exact opposite.

For the record I don’t blame them, that’s the job.

FWIW, if all HR is doing is carrying out the dirty work that the business needs they, and the business, are missing out on a bigger strategic piece of the function, and in the process, compensating for poor leadership.

 

[Drew0311]

This is gonna be long-winded, so apologies. But curious if anyone has been in a toxic work environment and how you handled it. Note this is all from my perspective, and I am 100% aware a company/HR has their own perspective.

I started a job around 8 months ago. It's an ok company, but I was out of work for a while and needed SOMETHING so accepted their offer. I have 20 years of experience, and this job is knowingly (to the company and to me) very junior as to what I was doing previously. I don't think the work or the position was beneath me in any way.

My manager and I have a fine working relationship, but over the past few months, there is an increase of 'nitpicking' and meetings thrown on calendars to discuss what I consider maybe worthy of a quick Slack message. But I digress...it's how the company works so it's fine. It's things like 'you set your Slack notifications to mute for a few hours and that is a horrible look'. As an FYI, I am fully online, but when I'm head down and writing something I don't like to be disturbed. Anyone can message me, it's just that I won't get back to you for a bit. Also we have weekly metrics that are due every week, and company documents state 'share with manager weekly on Friday'. I share mine every week between 5 and 6...but got told that's past business hours. Fine, I can submit late afternoon.

The company also offers free mental health therapy which I think is great. Six weeks ago I scheduled my first session with a therapist and she had to reschedule, so I did. The second try, she just never joined the session. I informed HR of this and they were concerned and stated they'd flag it up to the highest people because that's not great. A month goes by. I follow up several times with HR and no updates. I schedule a different therapist, they cancel. I tell HR. It's now been six weeks and there is no update or resolve.

Manager throws calendar invites on my calendar with no agenda or topic of what it's for. To me, that is incredibly stressful. A couple of months ago, I told her I would appreciate if I had a sense of what meetings were about before heading into them. Nothing changed.

Had a meeting this morning with manager and it all went south. She brought up Slack and metrics and I said those are fair and I'll work on those, but it's frustrating to see that this types of things are huge concerns for employees but mental health doesn't seem to be. She immediately called me defensive and ended the meeting. Was I defensive? I was not happy but I was just being truthful in my stress and frustration.

She threw a meeting with me and her and HR on the calendar for this afternoon. I walked into a landmine. I stated my concerns, and HR person literally rolled her eyes and said she didn't believe me. Then asked why metrics were sent at 6:00 last week and truth be told, I was interviewing for another job, but I just said I was dealing with some personal matters and HR pressed me asking what personal stuff I was going through. I said it was private and don't have to provide that information, and she pressed me again asking specifically what I'm going through. That is, according to my HR friend I chatted with, horrible behavior for an HR professional and actually could be considered harassment.

Meeting ended with HR basically telling me I better put on my happy company face in my next meeting with colleagues, which is basically a threat.

There are countless other examples of red flags I could mention, but these were the straw that broke the camels back. I'm walking in tomorrow with documentation of what I consider a toxic work environment, and submitting my resignation effective immediately.

Am I too soft? I have never felt so disrespected for providing my view of company issues in my life. I'm too old to deal with a work environment like that.

Not sure if you are to
Soft or not. The mental health thing was strange that you went straight to HR instead of setting up a way to communicate with the shrink.

Also if they told you reports are so in the afternoon they should be done in the afternoon.

I assume when I go to work I am on their time. Not my time. If I have something personal going on I contact my boss before and let him know. That way he knows reports might be a bit late and he is always fine with that. I don’t just do them late and tell him after that I had personal issues I can’t discuss with him.

Also maybe the company sucks also. Most corporate companies suck. Managers are always trying to impress their boss by adding new rules and making everyone miserable. Our VP is just did that to us. Added a bunch of nonsense so he can tell his boss that he was doing stuff when prior our department ran smooth and make a ton of money

 

[simply1]

You think that’s bad, I wfh with a 4 and 2 year old and I’m HR!

 

[herbicide]

 

[cyphoon]

curious if anyone has been in a toxic work environment and how you handled it.

Twice. I left both times. Both were good decisions. Neither of my situations was quite like yours.

If you haven't yet, start documenting everything that has happened, especially with regard to their failure on the mental health services. Screenshots, documents, emails and slack chats exported to PDF. Save all this documentation on a computer or resource that they have no control over. Seems like a legal storm is brewing.

Beyond that, if you absolutely need this job right now, then you may have to conform to some of what they are asking for. If you don't absolutely need this job right now, then I wouldn't change a bit.

Last thing, I am getting a vibe that they want to get rid of you. Because you have asked for mental health assistance, they know they they have to tread carefully. All these meetings and nitpicky attention to details are evidence to me that they are dotting their i's and crossing their t's so they can claim they let you go for cause. Apologies if that seems blunt.

"We offer mental health services" ... my giant white ass you do.

H

 

[cyphoon]

Micro managing is about to push me out of my current job I've had for 10 years. Re-orgs with new leadership...

Sometimes, this means "we would fire you if we could, but that is a lot a hassle and paperwork, so we are just going to make you miserable until you leave."

The counter offensive to that is quiet quitting. It pains me to say that, as an ardent capitalist who enjoys their career. But these top heavy corporations bring it on themselves.

I got called out a month ago for being logged out of Slack for several hours

chromdriver + selenium + a simple python script, and you will have the highest slack availability of any employee in your company. "That guy never sleeps!"

Hmmm... sensing a business opportunity here.

H

 

[cyphoon]

Just out of curiosity, how old are you, how old is your boss, and how old is the HR manager?

Prediction without looking ahead:
Boss: mid 40's, enjoys life outside of work, aint online Friday at 6 PM
HR: gen Z boss with a mini ... or mid to upper 50's woman with a Tammy Faye makeup job, deep brown winter tan, and cheap perfume you can smell 4 cubicles away.