Ah I see the horror stories are coming out.
Frankly I have been to Iowa City for a bunch of Iowa State games and always had a good time. I know a lot of Iowa fans and tailgate with them just off Melrose and literally have never had a bad encounter (beyond a few drunk college kids yelling stupid stuff).
I would suggest going, it’s a lot of fun and Kinnick is a great venue for college football.
I have had similar experiences. I'm assuming being intermingled in a larger group with friends on both sides keeps everything a lot more relaxed and fun.