Youth Sports and some Questions

[VeloClone]

I feel your pain. Im the coach of an U10 soccer team and consistently never have more than 8 of my 12 players at practice. I have tried to make other arrangments but between my own schedule, kids in football, taekwondo, swim and so on it is a major challenge.

The regulars i do have are the ones performing in games, while the others watch the wind blow, and cant remember which direct their supposed to go.

As others have indicated, rec sports has become about socializing and unpaid babysitting. My first interaction with my team this yr was an open invite to all parents to seek help during practice, i have yet to have a single parent help me since the season began.

I wish you were coaching my 9 year old's team. I offered to assist since she was coaching alone and she laughed in my face. (I just stepped away from assistant coaching my 12 year old's team which I had been with for 4 years.) Another parent told me yesterday that his offer to help had been brusquely turned down as well. He had coached his son's team before this year as well (and it is clear by watching the kid play that he has been well coached). I am trying to be a good parent (it is sometimes tough when you are used to wearing the coach hat), but I see her struggling and I don't know how to help without stepping on toes.

As far as keeping it fun - especially at the young ages I couldn't agree more. Our 9 year olds never come across the field and high five all of the spectators like every other team in our league does - win or lose. One parent told me he asked his son why they don't and he said coach told them she doesn't want them to. It is little things like a fun game that teaches something but doesn't feel like work at the end of a practice, snacks at halftime, and - yes - even high-fiving all the parents and getting a "good game" after losing 10-0 that keeps it fun and keeps them coming back until they start to figure it out. I doubt that anything will change since I just learned that she sits on the club's board.

 

[BillyClone]

I'll give my two cents...

I think we should do away with rec leagues as they currently exist.

Keep the travel teams, keep the AAU, keep the club sports. Those are different animals.

But I suggest completely overhauling rec leagues by getting rid of the following:

• Drafting teams that never change throughout the season
• Keeping score of games and thus, keeping track of league standings
• Volunteer coaches without training
• Separating kids by age and not skill level

After my experiences with recreational leagues, both as a coach and as a parent, I think that recreational sports should become more "clinic" and less "competition".

Begin with training of the volunteer coaches. Pay an expert to provide the training. Maybe use the high school coaching staff or local club coaches. Teach the volunteers what skills are important at the youth level, what skills need to be developed, and what skills can wait until an older age. Give your volunteers confidence that they are teaching the right things the right way.

Next, determine what abilities constitute which skill level for a participant. For example, can’t hit a pitched baseball at over 30 mph = Level 1, ability to make 8 of 10 layups = Level 5, dribble soccer ball through zig-zag course in 15-20 seconds = Level 3, etc.

Next, evaluate each participant's skill level. Make evaluations a requirement for participation. With this information, you can separate the participants by skill level and focus on them as a group, building each participant up at the same time.

Now you can run a clinic, with children split up by skill level, receiving instruction from trained volunteers, with drills and structured practice made to develop skills deemed appropriate for the participant level of ability. If game experience is needed, use the last part of clinic to form up teams and play games within each skill level. Make the teams different each time – different players and coaches.

I believe this approach would work and would foster interest and enjoyment for the kids as well as provide the skill development that many parents want to see.

 

[mramseyISU]

Interesting read here. I've got two boys playing baseball right now. The oldest played 10U USSSA at the A and AA level this year. The youngest played rec ball for kids going into 3rd and 4th grade. I ended up being an assistant on both teams, I'm just a dad but baseball is my favorite sport and has been since I was a kid. What I'm seeing, at least in Iowa is you don't really have a middle ground really for baseball. The closest thing from what I can see is the USSSA ball in the lower divisions. Rec ball here has mostly volunteer coaches, they do hire a few college age kids but that's only because not enough parents want to step in and help. My experience is that with rec the way the rules are structured it's really hard to enforce any sort of discipline on a kid who's not showing up for practice. In the rec league here nobody can sit more than one inning in a row in the field and everybody has to hit. Little Billy might have been 15 minutes late for every practice and a disruption once he got there but I'm required to play him just as much as Little Johnny who was on time and always listens. Once you get the the USSSA levels the two lower levels you can take things semi-seriously but still focus on having fun and when you're looking at $500 to get your kid on a cheap team parents have some skin in the game. On the other hand though the number of parents that seem to think their kid is the next Bryce Harper increases exponentially when you move to travel ball. We had to kick a first kid off the team because of a dip **** dad after this season. There's only so many drunk text messages the HC could handle complaining about playing time for a kid that had 3 hits all year.

Speaking of ******* dads, I saw a couple get ran out of my son's 5th/6th grade football game yesterday and they had to call the cops to get one of the morons to leave. That's two guys who definitely peaked in 6th grade.

I guess my advise as somebody who volunteers in baseball travel and rec along with Lego League (great parents) and as a Cubmaster is if you don't like where things are going then get involved and volunteer. Help steer the ship and it sounds like you're already doing that. If you're steering the boat and somebody doesn't like it, ask them if you can expect them to volunteer at the next practice/meeting. 99% of the time the answer is no and about 75% you'll never see them again.

 

[Cybball37]

I remember "back in the day" (geesh, I sound super old saying that). There was only rec league. No USSSA, no clubs, no nothing. Everyone played at their own respective little league. All sorts of talents all mixed together, and most of the coaches (most, not all) knew baseball. Now, it's so separated out and the rec league kids are either not good, or just starting out and need instruction, or both, or their parent's needed a babysitter. This seperation also most likely affected the coaching too. I dealt the last 2 seasons with a HC that pretty much knew his kid wasn't the caliber that was cut out for advanced leagues, but he coached rec league like he was and treated everything else that way. It really did suck. Had the same kids sitting the bench every other inning, every single game. His kid pitched the first three innings of every single game (my kid isn't a pitcher, but there were a few others on the team that never got a shot).
That's no fun. Those kids that sat tried hard and weren't slackers, but just weren't as talented as some of the others. I think work ethic and respect do come first. If you don't have those, you don't play. But beyond that in rec league, you should play and should have fun. 99.99% of these kids aren't going to play baseball or any other sport professionally and should really be there for exercise, team building, hard work, and winning together. (I'm the farthest from being an "every kid gets a ribbon" kind of dad). I've been on some seriously bad teams that were the funnest groups and made the best memories. Keep that in mind when signing up to coach. That plastic trophy doesn't mean crap on my mantle, but the memories those kids will have will last.

 

[Gossamer]

I'll give my two cents...

I think we should do away with rec leagues as they currently exist.

Keep the travel teams, keep the AAU, keep the club sports. Those are different animals.

But I suggest completely overhauling rec leagues by getting rid of the following:

• Drafting teams that never change throughout the season
• Keeping score of games and thus, keeping track of league standings
• Volunteer coaches without training
• Separating kids by age and not skill level

After my experiences with recreational leagues, both as a coach and as a parent, I think that recreational sports should become more "clinic" and less "competition".

Begin with training of the volunteer coaches. Pay an expert to provide the training. Maybe use the high school coaching staff or local club coaches. Teach the volunteers what skills are important at the youth level, what skills need to be developed, and what skills can wait until an older age. Give your volunteers confidence that they are teaching the right things the right way.

Next, determine what abilities constitute which skill level for a participant. For example, can’t hit a pitched baseball at over 30 mph = Level 1, ability to make 8 of 10 layups = Level 5, dribble soccer ball through zig-zag course in 15-20 seconds = Level 3, etc.

Next, evaluate each participant's skill level. Make evaluations a requirement for participation. With this information, you can separate the participants by skill level and focus on them as a group, building each participant up at the same time.

Now you can run a clinic, with children split up by skill level, receiving instruction from trained volunteers, with drills and structured practice made to develop skills deemed appropriate for the participant level of ability. If game experience is needed, use the last part of clinic to form up teams and play games within each skill level. Make the teams different each time – different players and coaches.

I believe this approach would work and would foster interest and enjoyment for the kids as well as provide the skill development that many parents want to see.

You bring up some good points. I'd argue that eliminating the score aspect is incorrect. Kids keep score and it's why games are played...kids need to learn how to lose as much as win, so I say keep that in.

100% on the age vs skill. The only dilemma is how you determine skill. It can be subjective so you'll have to develop that carefully...but I agree.

In particular, US Youth Soccer has ruined a large portion of kids league with their new implementation of age related levels. Kids have been forced into teams they have no business being on, on both sides of the equation.

Training for volunteer coaches might be difficult because you already have a shortage. Now you are asking for a volunteer to do more? I want to say that will work but I fear it may have the opposite effect.

 

[Gossamer]

I remember "back in the day" (geesh, I sound super old saying that). There was only rec league. No USSSA, no clubs, no nothing. Everyone played at their own respective little league. All sorts of talents all mixed together, and most of the coaches (most, not all) knew baseball. Now, it's so separated out and the rec league kids are either not good, or just starting out and need instruction, or both, or their parent's needed a babysitter. This seperation also most likely affected the coaching too. I dealt the last 2 seasons with a HC that pretty much knew his kid wasn't the caliber that was cut out for advanced leagues, but he coached rec league like he was and treated everything else that way. It really did suck. Had the same kids sitting the bench every other inning, every single game. His kid pitched the first three innings of every single game (my kid isn't a pitcher, but there were a few others on the team that never got a shot).
That's no fun. Those kids that sat tried hard and weren't slackers, but just weren't as talented as some of the others. I think work ethic and respect do come first. If you don't have those, you don't play. But beyond that in rec league, you should play and should have fun. 99.99% of these kids aren't going to play baseball or any other sport professionally and should really be there for exercise, team building, hard work, and winning together. (I'm the farthest from being an "every kid gets a ribbon" kind of dad). I've been on some seriously bad teams that were the funnest groups and made the best memories. Keep that in mind when signing up to coach. That plastic trophy doesn't mean crap on my mantle, but the memories those kids will have will last.

awesome perspective!!!

 

[Farnsworth]

Quick Question. What % of rec league coaches are parents of a player within the league? From reading through the thread it seems like that it'd be closer to 100%. Do these rec leagues not reach out or advertise to young adults who might like to volunteer and be involved in such opportunities?

I have a bunch of friends who are young adults without kids who coach local hockey rec leagues, and they seem to be doing great.

 

[mramseyISU]

Quick Question. What % of rec league coaches are parents of a player within the league? From reading through the thread it seems like that it'd be closer to 100%. Do these rec leagues not reach out or advertise to young adults who might like to volunteer and be involved in such opportunities?

I have a bunch of friends who are young adults without kids who coach local hockey rec leagues, and they seem to be doing great.

In baseball where I live it's about 75% as far as other sports go I don't really have a lot of experience. My youngest son lucked out last winter for basketball and ended up getting Kent McCausland as his 2nd grade coach. That was kind of fun watching him practice for a guy like that.

 

[Incyte]

Quick Question. What % of rec league coaches are parents of a player within the league? From reading through the thread it seems like that it'd be closer to 100%. Do these rec leagues not reach out or advertise to young adults who might like to volunteer and be involved in such opportunities?

I have a bunch of friends who are young adults without kids who coach local hockey rec leagues, and they seem to be doing great.

I volunteer for very young kids soccer and baseball (k-2nd) and it's 100% parents in my town.

Young adults usually do 'clinics' associated with their team.

 

[CRCy]

I remember "back in the day" (geesh, I sound super old saying that). There was only rec league. No USSSA, no clubs, no nothing. Everyone played at their own respective little league. All sorts of talents all mixed together, and most of the coaches (most, not all) knew baseball. Now, it's so separated out and the rec league kids are either not good, or just starting out and need instruction, or both, or their parent's needed a babysitter. This seperation also most likely affected the coaching too. I dealt the last 2 seasons with a HC that pretty much knew his kid wasn't the caliber that was cut out for advanced leagues, but he coached rec league like he was and treated everything else that way. It really did suck. Had the same kids sitting the bench every other inning, every single game. His kid pitched the first three innings of every single game (my kid isn't a pitcher, but there were a few others on the team that never got a shot).
That's no fun. Those kids that sat tried hard and weren't slackers, but just weren't as talented as some of the others. I think work ethic and respect do come first. If you don't have those, you don't play. But beyond that in rec league, you should play and should have fun. 99.99% of these kids aren't going to play baseball or any other sport professionally and should really be there for exercise, team building, hard work, and winning together. (I'm the farthest from being an "every kid gets a ribbon" kind of dad). I've been on some seriously bad teams that were the funnest groups and made the best memories. Keep that in mind when signing up to coach. That plastic trophy doesn't mean crap on my mantle, but the memories those kids will have will last.

I don't think all rec league teams are like that. I coach my son's on rec league and yes there are a few kids that struggle or have an attitude but that is what makes it so much fun for me as a coach.

EVERY kid plays every position and every game I move the batting order down one slot, so the same kids aren't always at the bottom of the lineup. It's about development and not ONLY about winning some stupid meaningless trophy.

We had a game (fall league) just last night and one of our lesser talented kid had struck out the first two times up. He was leading off the next inning and I pulled him aside to give him a couple of pointers. He looked me straight in the eye and said "It doesn't matter I am just going to strike out again" I told him that he wasn't and just believe he is going to get a hit if he does these couple of things different.

He got a hit that AB and another one his next time up. The smile on his face after the first hit is what youth sports is all about to me. He "got it" and was so happy about it. Those are the the reasons why I coach. I could give two ***** if we lose or win but kids having fun and getting better is what it really should be all about.

In many cases the "travel teams" have taken that away from so many kids because parents are ******* idiots and don't realize the pressure they are putting on the kids to win a $10 trophy isn't what it's about. Of course winning and the lessons that come with winning and losing are important but not nearly as important as letting kids be kids and having fun.

Travel teams are fine but in far too many cases idiot parents ruin it for their kids.

 

[Cybball37]

I don't think all rec league teams are like that. I coach my son's on rec league and yes there are a few kids that struggle or have an attitude but that is what makes it so much fun for me as a coach.

EVERY kid plays every position and every game I move the batting order down one slot, so the same kids aren't always at the bottom of the lineup. It's about development and not ONLY about winning some stupid meaningless trophy.

We had a game (fall league) just last night and one of our lesser talented kid had struck out the first two times up. He was leading off the next inning and I pulled him aside to give him a couple of pointers. He looked me straight in the eye and said "It doesn't matter I am just going to strike out again" I told him that he wasn't and just believe he is going to get a hit if he does these couple of things different.

He got a hit that AB and another one his next time up. The smile on his face after the first hit is what youth sports is all about to me. He "got it" and was so happy about it. Those are the the reasons why I coach. I could give two ***** if we lose or win but kids having fun and getting better is what it really should be all about.

In many cases the "travel teams" have taken that away from so many kids because parents are ******* idiots and don't realize the pressure they are putting on the kids to win a $10 trophy isn't what it's about. Of course winning and the lessons that come with winning and losing are important but not nearly as important as letting kids be kids and having fun.

Travel teams are fine but in far too many cases idiot parents ruin it for their kids.

Didn't mean to imply or sound like they all were. Just what we had to deal with this year. Sounds like you "get it" and are a great coach. I coached for that same look on faces. That's what it's all about. Keep at it!

 

[CRCy]

Didn't mean to imply or sound like they all were. Just what we had to deal with this year. Sounds like you "get it" and are a great coach. I coached for that same look on faces. That's what it's all about. Keep at it!

No worries.

 

[VeloClone]

Sunday we had an opposing dad start talking **** to one of our players. There was a collision and one of their players hit the deck and didn't get up right away. The player was rather slight and she was on the ground more than all of the other players on both teams combined. But this particular parent found it appropriate to start asking our 12 year old girl player what she was doing running over their player and when she ignored him (way to go, girl), turned around and headed back towards her bench he shouted "that's right, walk away." Several of our parents respectfully reminded him that it was the referee's place and not his to deal with the game and that he should refrain from talking to our players.

I can occasionally be overly passionate, but I cannot imagine what is going through some of these parents' minds sometimes.