Estate and Probate Question...

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Tazzels

Member
Aug 22, 2006
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'72 Winnebago
1) I was wondering if anyone knew of a good website with a message board for legal information regarding probate and estate law.

2) What I'm trying to do if determine what is a reasonable compenstion for personal care for my grandmother who passed away. My parents took care of my grandmother for about 5 years. They would spend 20-25 hours a week making sure she got fed 3 times a day, exercised, bathed, cleaning and changing clothes, cleaning house, etc. My grandmother lived about 5 miles away.

If they didn't take care of her, she would not have been able to live at home and would have been put in a care center at $25-35 k/year.

Any information would be greatly appreciated! Thanks.
 

tube1

Well-Known Member
Oct 19, 2006
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1) I was wondering if anyone knew of a good website with a message board for legal information regarding probate and estate law.

2) What I'm trying to do if determine what is a reasonable compenstion for personal care for my grandmother who passed away. My parents took care of my grandmother for about 5 years. They would spend 20-25 hours a week making sure she got fed 3 times a day, exercised, bathed, cleaning and changing clothes, cleaning house, etc. My grandmother lived about 5 miles away.

If they didn't take care of her, she would not have been able to live at home and would have been put in a care center at $25-35 k/year.

Any information would be greatly appreciated! Thanks.

Putting a price on love? For one of your parents, that was their mom. How many years did mom feed them, bathe them, clean up after them, etc? Maybe I'm missing something here. You get paid for doing something your own parent?

As Lelo says, "family means no one is left behind."
 

Tazzels

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Aug 22, 2006
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There were 4 other siblings. No one else contributed to the care. Their feelings were just put him in an old age home. He would have been luckly to last 1-2 years there. Now that he is passed, they want to split up the estate equally.
 

bos

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Apr 10, 2006
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There were 4 other siblings. No one else contributed to the care. Their feelings were just put him in an old age home. He would have been luckly to last 1-2 years there. Now that he is passed, they want to split up the estate equally.
My mom went through the same thing with my great aunt and my grandma. All of her siblings felt entitled even though they never came back to visit or offer to help. Now the family barely speaks to one another.
 

brianhos

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This is exactly why I am getting my will and papers drawn up in the next few weeks. Not that I plan on needing them for a while though.
 

cycloneML

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Mar 5, 2008
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Putting a price on love? For one of your parents, that was their mom. How many years did mom feed them, bathe them, clean up after them, etc? Maybe I'm missing something here. You get paid for doing something your own parent?

As Lelo says, "family means no one is left behind."

You are missing something here. This is a real life issue.
 

Jerry1982

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Sep 3, 2006
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There were 4 other siblings. No one else contributed to the care. Their feelings were just put him in an old age home. He would have been luckly to last 1-2 years there. Now that he is passed, they want to split up the estate equally.

Hopefully there was a will and Grandpa didn't die intestate. Usually such compensation is taken care of in a will. I'm not a lawyer, but I don't think you'll have much luck. If there was no will I'm quite certain that Iowa law will say equally among the siblings after any taxes and expenses.

Are your folks executors? That's probably good for 5% or so.
 

gardner

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Mar 19, 2006
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Unless there was any type of agreement for payment for services, with the passing of your grandmother, you probably won't be able to get compensation for services rendered. Also, any compensation would be subject to income taxes, whereas the inheritance would not be subject to inheritance taxes.

Personal representatives (administrator or executor) in Iowa can get a fee up to 2% (normally.)

I didn't stay at a Holiday Inn Express, but I am a lawyer.
 

Steve

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Apr 11, 2006
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Now is the wrong time to start thinking about compensation...

Your comment hits the nail on the head.

Siblings might not always agree with how a parent chose to pass on their estate, but they need to accept the fact that it is the parent's decision to make. A parent has a lifetime of interactions that produce a wide range of emotions involving each of their children - it can range from extreme pride to wanting to disown them. One simply can't choose to focus on the past 5 years - I'm almost certain that the grandparent didn't. If the grandparent truly desired for the care givers to receive additional compensation, there should be documentation that provides for it. If not, one have to respect the grandparent's decision to provide equal shares for all of the siblings.
 

jmb

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Apr 12, 2006
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Unless there was any type of agreement for payment for services, with the passing of your grandmother, you probably won't be able to get compensation for services rendered. Also, any compensation would be subject to income taxes, whereas the inheritance would not be subject to inheritance taxes.

Personal representatives (administrator or executor) in Iowa can get a fee up to 2% (normally.)

I didn't stay at a Holiday Inn Express, but I am a lawyer.
It would seem like we would need more info before saying that they are not subject to inheritance tax.
 

Phaedrus

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Jan 13, 2008
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My brother will end up caring for our parents in their dotage, due to geographical proximity. Therefore, my wife and I have decided to make sure that he gets compensated out of our share of whatever inheritance we may get, because the other two siblings are selfish jerks. We won't tell him this, but there are some things that are more important in life than money, and this is the honorable thing to do.
 

Tazzels

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Aug 22, 2006
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There is a signed compensation agreement drafted by a lawyer. The agreement states that personal care will be compensated at a reasonable rate.

Now what is reasonable? Sort of gray area here. Hind sight is 20/20, but the rate should have been clearly defined.

Personally, I think $20k a year would be reasonable. But that is just my opinion.
 

Bobber

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Apr 12, 2006
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Hudson, Iowa
A nursing home would be 2 or 3 times that, but that is 24-7 care. Sounds like you're trying to do the right thing figuring out what it might cost if someone else were to do the work. Hopefully your family can communicate well enough with all the siblings to get the point across. These kind of things can cause a lot of hard feelings.