Contrived Xmas Argument: Santa... Man or Elf

[NorthCyd]

I was reading the night before Christmas to the kids tonight and the book had Santa illustrated just as the story describes him, an elf in a miniature sleigh with tiny reindeer. I had never even thought about him being described that way in the story. The night before Christmas has to be essentially the origin story for the modern mythos of Santa Clause, so doesn't that mean he is an elf and all those depictions of him as a giant fat man are wrong? I feel like my whole life is a lie...

 

[bsaltyman]

I believe The Night Before Christmas even describes him as a “jolly old elf”, so I’d say he’s an elf...

 

[ianoconnor]

Man.

 

[Sigmapolis]

Wanted for breaking and entering.

 

[NorthCyd]

I believe The Night Before Christmas even describes him as a “jolly old elf”, so I’d say he’s an elf...

All of the girls were pointing at the illustrations and asking why Santa and his reindeer were so small. I had no answers...

 

[NorthCyd]

Wanted for breaking and entering.

Well, being an elf would certainly be advantageous for essentially being a cat burglar.

 

[Knownothing]

No way an elf can fly around the world and deliver all those presents. Geesh quit living a fairytale man he’s clearly a big fat guy.

 

[SoapyCy]

Believe it or not the modern Santa asthetic was created by Coca-Cola

 

[UnCytely]

Let's compromise: he's like Elrond from Lord of the Rings, he's half elf, half man.

 

[BoxsterCy]

I prefer to think he is a Yeti.

 

[Dr.bannedman]

santa and god are thew same guy

 

[SpokaneCY]

Shape-shifting demi-god of the underworld.

 

[SpokaneCY]

santa and god are thew same guy

Satan and santa - same letters, same man, same red color.

 

[JM4CY]

I was reading the night before Christmas to the kids tonight and the book had Santa illustrated just as the story describes him, an elf in a miniature sleigh with tiny reindeer. I had never even thought about him being described that way in the story. The night before Christmas has to be essentially the origin story for the modern mythos of Santa Clause, so doesn't that mean he is an elf and all those depictions of him as a giant fat man are wrong? I feel like my whole life is a lie...

 

[KnappShack]

Half man...

...half horse

 

[BCClone]

I look back and realize that playing Santa at corporate parties would have been a great gig. Hang out, let the liquor flow and have fun.

In photo, was that suppose to be a person hyperventilating and they are bag breathing?

 

[cyclones500]

All of the girls were pointing at the illustrations and asking why Santa and his reindeer were so small. I had no answers...

Tell them, "Illustrations are not Actual Size."

 

[BCClone]

Tell them, "Illustrations are not Actual Size."

I prefer, "bigger than it appears"

 

[Cyclones_R_GR8]

I always find it amusing when they show this on regular TV. You just can't get the full effect unless you are watching an uncut version.

 

[cdface]

Satan and santa - same letters, same man, same red color.

reminds me of this scene:

https://quipvid.com/watch/497Ej4om