A little dating advice...

[cyclonedave25]

I think the problem here is you guys are putting the ***** on a pedestal.

"That's the second time I've heard that! What is the ***** on the pedestal thing?!?"
:wink:

 

[cycoOJfan89]

Chances are 90% of the people on here had the same problem as you are having. it just comes with trial and error and getting older.

Agreed, I can think of a lot of guys that are waaaaaaaaayyyy worse than I am with women. Here is how I see it, there is picking up ladies drunk (easy) and picking up the ladies sober (entirely different game).

I still regret starting this b/c now I will have the title of being horrid with ladies when I'm not THAT bad (I get quite a bit of chances), just wanted a couple tips on why maybe girls would bail on me if they had previously agree to hang out or go on a date with me! Now all the sudden I have no confidence and am putting "it" on a pedestal.

 

[cycoOJfan89]

After this thread I want to...

 

[cstrunk]

Sounds like you are doing alright, but are just impatient. I don't think you need to change a whole lot of things (what do I know, I'm not very good either haha).

When you find stumble upon a situation to get into a relationship, you will probably know it. If you are having to struggle with getting one in particular to go out on a date, then I would give it a rest and move on... at least for 2 weeks to let her cycle change to give it one more shot.

 

[EYEoftheSTORM]

This is probably true. I guess it kind of hit me when my 19 year old sister just got engaged (she goes to Iowa so who cares I guess) and my oldest brother who is 26 is about to have child number 4. My brother who is 25 still is single and has a bachelors pad in downtown Minneapolis (my avatar is from his balcony), but he's had serious relationships in the past unlike me.

Anyway another reason I posted this was because there was this girl whom I met freshman year but she was dating my good friend, well now its been over 2 years and I've known for a few months there had been at least an interest level in me. So we have been talking and we were suppose to meet up last thursday night but I blacked out and ended up telling her to go to 4th floor legacy, then on the 6th floor, than knapp st, and she was trying to meet up with me but I kept leaving and going to other places in my drunken state. I ended up at Paddy's and shes only 20, but that night could of ****** her off, if she was trying to meet up and I kept telling her different places to go.

I apologized for playing drunk tag (100% on me) and we set up a date for... tonight and like I had predicted she bailed! She could have a perfectly good reason but it has happened so many times in the past I have a hard time believing her. She did say however, we should go out together this weekend... so once again I'll have to wait and see if she is actually true to her word.

never and I repeat never put the blame 100% on you unless you are either dating them, or married to them, it shows you are submissive and have a lack of pride for yourself. Even if the issue is all your fault you do not admit it to her unless it it one of the two reasons I stated above.

You should have just said, "sorry we couldn't meet up last night it was a crazy night" and leave it at that, and a few days later ask her if she would like hang out. Play the **** head move and if she agrees to see you again than its a win situation, otherwise if she doesnt see you again, well there are billions of women in this world, just try again.

NEVER EVER dwell on one woman unless she is your wife.

 

[jdoggivjc]

I scoffed at the advice growing up, but now that I'm all grown up and married I realize it's some of the best advice I had ever received. The best dating advice that there is, if you're looking for that permanent relationship, is just don't date period. Seriously. Surround yourself with a lot of friends and focus on developing friendships. Have a great time in the process. More than likely you'll end up growing close with one person in that group and something will develop. Best part about this is you learn who you are and aren't compatible with without getting stung too badly in the process.

 

[Brentwood]

From the great movie Slackers: "Treat them like dirt and they will stick to you like mud"

 

[Frak]

My opinion is that it is tough to go from talking to some girl at the bar or on campus to an actual date. Too much pressure. And the girl is always worried about guys being creepy/stalker/psycho. You have to diffuse that situation and make her trust you enough to be out with you one on one. To do that, I'd try to set up a situation where she could invite some friends. Plan something like a party or an informal pub crawl or a horseshoes tournament in the back yard. Even something like a bowling league at Perfect Games would work. Or use VEISHEA to your advantage. Just something like "Hey, a bunch of us are doing X Saturday, you and your friends should come". If she doesn't show, then it's not going to work out. The key is to find something that is going to be really fun that her friends would be excited about too so that she doesn't have to do much convincing.

If she DOES show up, then pay attention to her, but don't hang on her all night. Let her friends see that you're a good guy, funny and trustable (and avoid trying to take her home). If everyone has fun, then ask her out sometime middle of the next week.

 

[CloneIce]

Go Caveman style. Hit em on the head with a club and drag them back to your cave, then ply them with a warm fire and mammoth meat.

 

[cycoOJfan89]

"Hey, a bunch of us are doing X Saturday, you and your friends should come".

I don't know if doing X is going to help the situation

If it does help I'm not sure I would want to further pursue...

 

[Tedcyclone]

based on the post seems your a tool. Go on tool acadamy.

 

[cycoOJfan89]

based on the post seems your a tool. Go on tool acadamy.

Not jacked enough... but thanks though? :no:

 

[Monkey]

I met my wife at the Kum & Go. On our first date she came and went.