Hosting an exchange student

[Colorado]

Have any of you ever done this? We weren't planning on hosting a student but the opportunity fell into our lap and now we are approved. A student had come into the country for orientation and her original host family backed out the day before she was supposed to move in. We've been working over the past week to submit paperwork, interview, etc. and now she's moving in on Thursday. We have a daughter and our daughter and the exchange student are the same age/grade and will attend the same school. We're all incredibly excited for this opportunity.

For anyone that has done this before, offer up any guidance that you might have. I'm open to tips/tricks/hacks/things to avoid. We are certainly aware of the obvious things so looking for the nuances that might make this experience even better.

Now I need to find some ISU gear for her to wear...

 

[VeloClone]

Is she French?

 

[BillBrasky4Cy]

Have any of you ever done this? We weren't planning on hosting a student but the opportunity fell into our lap and now we are approved. A student had come into the country for orientation and her original host family backed out the day before she was supposed to move in. We've been working over the past week to submit paperwork, interview, etc. and now she's moving in on Thursday. We have a daughter and our daughter and the exchange student are the same age/grade and will attend the same school. We're all incredibly excited for this opportunity.

For anyone that has done this before, offer up any guidance that you might have. I'm open to tips/tricks/hacks/things to avoid. We are certainly aware of the obvious things so looking for the nuances that might make this experience even better.

Now I need to find some ISU gear for her to wear...

HTF does that even happen?

 

[moores2]

HTF does that even happen?

It happens. Family emergencies. Diagnosed with cancer, any number of things.

 

[Gunnerclone]

Good on you. I think it takes a lot of guts and confidence to host an exchange student.

 

[moores2]

My parents hosted 11 different students over 12 years. (Between my kindergarten year all the way to Junior in high school). Make sure you include them in the family. You can't start treating them like a guest. Make sure they are helping with dishes after supper or around the house. My parents always called it "FFL" (Free foreign labor). Technically illegal to pay them.

 

[DeereClone]

Make sure your daughter knows that she can openly talk to you about how things are going. You don't want her being envious, having trouble with the exchange student, etc and bottling that up inside because it would only lead to resentment of the exchange student.

Ask the exchange student what they want to see, accomplish, and do while they are here and try to meet those goals.

I haven't ever hosted an exchange student, but became good friends with two of them in high school and are still friends to this day. One moved to states and we see each other often, the other is in Australia but we stay in contact. Great opportunity for all involved.

 

[JRE1975]

My family and my wife's family both hosted foreign exchange students. My brother spent a year in Sweden under the same program.

Great experiences and all still stay in touch, 40+ years later.

Treat the exchange student just like you would your own child. Only problem was it took mom some time to teach the guy we had from Brazil, that came from a very wealthy family, that she was not his servant! We still laugh about how that turned out for him!

 

[isufbcurt]

This sounds like something Argent would take advantage of

 

[Clonefan32]

It seems like most have a good experience. I had a family member host a foreign exchange student and I think they were all ready for her to go home after about 2 weeks.

 

[SECyclone]

It seems like most have a good experience. I had a family member host a foreign exchange student and I think they were all ready for her to go home after about 2 weeks.

There was one in my high school that changed families mid year because they couldn’t get along.

 

[Gunnerclone]

It seems like most have a good experience. I had a family member host a foreign exchange student and I think they were all ready for her to go home after about 2 weeks.

We had an exchange student that came in to our class in Grade 11. That host family had to have their heads spinning. Started by hanging out with the nerds but a few months later she was hanging with the popular kids and just being a party animal. Completely changed her look and attitude so fast. I didn’t hang out very much with people from my school and didn’t go to class much so it was funny to watch from the “outside”.

 

[oldman]

You should read "Pygmy" by Chuck Palahniuk.

 

[BillBrasky4Cy]

This sounds like something Argent would take advantage of

LOL you owe me a new keyboard.

 

[cdekovic]

Don’t expect your daughter to befriend the exchange student and don’t force her to “take Martina to the party with you tonight” Our experience was only so so. The male student from the Czech Republic tried to take a lot of liberties they thought they were entitled to. Remember your daughter is yours for life, not so with the exchange student. Good luck.

 

[ImJustKCClone]

HTF does that even happen?

Unfortunately, it happens more than you'd think. Also, some of the sponsoring groups are a little shady, and will bring students over without secured host families, and will then guilt other families into hosting them (this happened to us - we had just completed 11 great months with an exchange student, but didn't want another right away).

 

[ImJustKCClone]

As for tips - We have had three students; two German boys and one Norwegian girl - plus the Japanese boy who had no pre-arranged host (he ended up with a family in Colo that didn't work out, then went to another family where he was very happy).
*Establish clear rules early, and make sure your student knows up front that you are NOT being paid for their care. This is a really common expectation from the students...that they don't need to do chores (clean their rooms, fold laundry, help with dishes) like their siblings because their way is "paid".
*Don't force friendship between your daughter and your student if it doesn't happen organically. They may be VERY different personalities. They can be "siblings" without being "besties".
*Learn your student's motivation for being an exchange student. Two of ours came to experience life in a different culture and a different family. One came because he wanted to be an airline pilot and needed to perfect his English and remove his German accent. He had no desire to be a part of our family, which made it pretty awkward at times.
*Give your student space. Having their own room is a bonus (many share rooms at home, so don't worry if you don't have a private bedroom for her). However, just like your own kids, she will want to be alone at times.
*When they first arrive, no matter how good their English-speaking skills are, they will go into sensory overload at first. Think of it this way - they are listening to English, mentally translating to their own language, formulating an answer in their own language, mentally translating that to English, and then replying. If you're observant, you can tell when overload happens - they get the thousand yard stare thing going.
*Enjoy it!!!!! It is an amazing experience most of the time, and I hope you have a great time with your student. We refer to our last one as our "imported son" and have maintained contact with him ever since he returned home waaaaaaay back in 1995. We've visited him in Germany several times, and he's come to see us a few times as well.

 

[ImJustKCClone]

Side note - for all three of our students, they truly knew they had acclimated the first time they dreamed in English.

 

[CycloneErik]

Side note - for all three of our students, they truly knew they had acclimated the first time they dreamed in English.

Replying to the longer post: A Japanese boy was placed in Colo, IA?
I could see that going poorly. In fact, I can't see it going any other way.

 

[Gunnerclone]

Replying to the longer post: A Japanese boy was placed in Colo, IA?
I could see that going poorly. In fact, I can't see it going any other way.

I was a white kid from the DSM western suburbs and I wouldn’t even stop in colo if I needed gas let alone live there.