Job Interview FUBARs

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Walden4Prez

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Jul 8, 2014
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I have a job interview today for the first time in like 12 years. It's a vertical move to a better role and I am pretty excited about it. But, it is my first interview in like 12 years. I have had other moves during that time, but they were always within the same group and the interviews were nothing more than a formality.

I talk in front of people all the time, give large presentations and can BS with the best of them. But, for some reason I have some nerves today.

I like to face my fears, so...what is the biggest interview FUBAR you have ever been witness to?

I was interviewing someone for a position via the phone a couple of years ago. The lady was at home and warned me I might hear her kids in the background. About 10 or 15mins in I hear one of her kids screaming and carrying on. She politely says "Sorry about that, can I step away for a moment?" Of course I told her.

At this point the mild-mannered, soft spoken professional I had been interviewing goes into a screeching fit "SHUT UP! I AM ON THE DAMN PHONE! MOMMY TOLD YOU THAT YOU HAD TO BE QUIET!!!!"

I am assuming she thought she had put her phone on mute or something, but it was directly into my ear. She then came back with her normal tone like nothing happened and continued.

I was holding back laughter on mute on my end. She didn't end up getting the job, but it wasn't because of the chaos during the interview.
 

cowgirl836

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Not mine, but when hiring was going on for my team, the hiring manager (woman in a fairly male-dominated field) told us how she did an interview with a man and he kept trying to mansplain a process to her even after she's like yes, I understand it, you can move on to ([how he used the process or whatever it was]. But he made sure to explain it in detail how it worked and kept interrupting her.

She developed that process. He was mansplaining her own work to her. He didn't get the job.
 

bstegs

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I interviewed a college student who instead of showing up to our office in his college town (where I was), drove to our office in Chicago. Now on a video conference, he couldn't decide whether to stand at the back of the conference room by the white board or right in front of the TV and camera. Thus whenever he had to write code, he briskly walked to the back of the room, but would return to the front for questions. It was equally hilarious and frustrating.
 

CtownCyclone

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Somehow I got on the interview team rotation at the plant safety department. I think I had done one of the guys a solid at one point, and he somehow felt that this was rewarding me for it. Whatever, I scored a few free lunches and some company swag, and it was also useful to be on the "other side" of the table.

So anyway, they're interviewing for some position (I can't remember what it was) and the interview team (me, safety engineer, safety manager, HR lady) are looking over the next resume, waiting for the time to come so we could call this guy (it was a phone interview). Safety manager says something about this resume seems familiar, but he can't place it.

Interview starts, and within about 2 minutes, he puts the phone on mute and exclaims that we had interviewed this guy for another position a few months back and he was supposed to be on the "Do not interview ever again because he's terrible" list. Somehow he snuck through. We couldn't end the interview early, so we slogged through it.

Safety manager was known to have basically 0 sense of humor, but he had some great zingers about the guy when we'd go on mute and he was answering questions. And he was right, the guy really was not a good fit for our industry at all.
 
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CloneinWDSM

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2nd round of interviews for my current job that I got out of college, one of the higher ups asked me if I had to wear many hats at previous jobs.

I froze. I had no idea what that expression meant. I can’t remember what I said exactly but I actually started to discuss a job where I had to wear a hat before I stopped and asked if he could explain his question more.

Got the job, still have the job so I must’ve been pretty good at bullshitting the rest of the process.
 

Walden4Prez

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Jul 8, 2014
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Somehow I got on the interview team rotation at the plant safety department. I think I had done one of the guys a solid at one point, and he somehow felt that this was rewarding me for it. Whatever, I scored a few free lunches and some company swag, and it was also useful to be on the "other side" of the table.

So anyway, they're interviewing for some position (I can't remember what it was) and the interview team (me, safety engineer, safety manager, HR lady) are looking over the next resume, waiting for the time to come so we could call this guy (it was a phone interview). Safety manager says something about this resume seems familiar, but he can't place it.

Interview starts, and within about 2 minutes, he puts the phone on mute and exclaims that we had interviewed this guy for another position a few months back and he was supposed to be on the "Do not interview ever again because he's terrible" list. Somehow he snuck through. We couldn't end the interview early, so we slogged through it.

Safety manager was known to have basically 0 sense of humor, but he had some great zingers about the guy when we'd go on mute and he was answering questions. And he was right, the guy really was not a good fit for our industry at all.

I had the exact same deal happen a year or two ago. 3 of us are in a conference room on the speaker phone with this guy. Before it even started I thought the resume was familiar, but couldn't place it. Then the guy starts talking. He used "Ya Know" at the end of every statement. And I knew immediately who it was, as we had a field day with this guy a few years previously. I went back and found old resumes later and sure enough, it was the same guy with the same resume. The only exception was this time he had "Bob" instead of "Robert" as his name.
 

KnappShack

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Somehow I got on the interview team rotation at the plant safety department. I think I had done one of the guys a solid at one point, and he somehow felt that this was rewarding me for it. Whatever, I scored a few free lunches and some company swag, and it was also useful to be on the "other side" of the table.

So anyway, they're interviewing for some position (I can't remember what it was) and the interview team (me, safety engineer, safety manager, HR lady) are looking over the next resume, waiting for the time to come so we could call this guy (it was a phone interview). Safety manager says something about this resume seems familiar, but he can't place it.

Interview starts, and within about 2 minutes, he puts the phone on mute and exclaims that we had interviewed this guy for another position a few months back and he was supposed to be on the "Do not interview ever again because he's terrible" list. Somehow he snuck through. We couldn't end the interview early, so we slogged through it.

Safety manager was known to have basically 0 sense of humor, but he had some great zingers about the guy when we'd go on mute and he was answering questions. And he was right, the guy really was not a good fit for our industry at all.

Kind of related, but I was at a company and we were looking to fill a position. A resume came across the hiring manager's desk for a guy I used to manage.

I was asked my opinion of the candidate and given his current resume

Well that resume looked really really familiar. The kid basically stole my resume and used it. Don't know how he got a copy but it was almost word for word.
 

Messi

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Had a recent college grad tell us “you guys are the only company I’ve interviewed with so if you offer I’ll accept on the spot”

we all knew what he meant and we did end up hiring him but we still give him **** that he threw any salary negotiation out the window with that comment.
 

CtownCyclone

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I had the exact same deal happen a year or two ago. 3 of us are in a conference room on the speaker phone with this guy. Before it even started I thought the resume was familiar, but couldn't place it. Then the guy starts talking. He used "Ya Know" at the end of every statement. And I knew immediately who it was, as we had a field day with this guy a few years previously. I went back and found old resumes later and sure enough, it was the same guy with the same resume. The only exception was this time he had "Bob" instead of "Robert" as his name.

This guy had my Spidey-sense tingling from the beginning of the resume. It had his name centered at the top, and beneath it (where you might put a title or position) he had "THE Professional Engineer".
 

CtownCyclone

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Kind of related, but I was at a company and we were looking to fill a position. A resume came across the hiring manager's desk for a guy I used to manage.

I was asked my opinion of the candidate and given his current resume

Well that resume looked really really familiar. The kid basically stole my resume and used it. Don't know how he got a copy but it was almost word for word.

That's a bold strategy.

We had a kid come in for an on-site interview. He was highly rated by the career fair team - in fact, he was listed as "Number 1" on several people's evaluation sheets. Dude shows up wearing ripped jeans, a polo shirt, and a ballcap.

He didn't get an offer.
 

Walden4Prez

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That's a bold strategy.

We had a kid come in for an on-site interview. He was highly rated by the career fair team - in fact, he was listed as "Number 1" on several people's evaluation sheets. Dude shows up wearing ripped jeans, a polo shirt, and a ballcap.

He didn't get an offer.

Do you even interview bruh?!?!?

Was it Zack Morris?
 

scottwv

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I was interviewing a candidate and had made it thru all the "canned questions. They had done well in the Q&A part and probably would have received an offer. However, in conversation at the end of the interview they mentioned to me that they took medical leave / temporary disability from their last job to work with and help their spouse start a new business.
 
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madguy30

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Nov 15, 2011
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I FUBARed one once but I think it was basically because I didn't really want the job.

Just out of college, was just interviewing to get any sort of job at a Family Video and when the interviewer/manager asked about customer service I flat out said I wasn't really big on faking a happy smiley face for people. He just kind of paused and said that's a bit of a concern and went about some other generic questions. I don't even know if I followed up...the guy reminded me of the douchey boyfriend from Van Wilder and I think was a former Hok player so I dodged one there from all sorts of angles.

Best post-college job just to have a job was bussing tables, hands down. Go in, clean off and set the tables, stock things, interact very little, get tipped out nicely plus wage, and leave.
 
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throwittoblythe

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Oh boy, I love this topic. I have too many to share in one post. I used to do a lot of interviewing. Mostly college kids at ISU. Some of my favorites:

- Girl walks into the interview room which had 3 people ready to ask her questions. First words out of her mouth were: "Lord, this is intimidating." Also, when asked "how do you handle constructive feedback?" she answered "Oh it crushes me. I'm completely unproductive for like 3 days after until I can get over it." Did not hire.

- Asked a kid at ISU to tell me about a time he overcame adversity. He told a story about how he got too drunk on Monday of finals week and slept through his final. Failed the class and had to take it over. Did not hire. I appreciated the honesty, but judgment in deciding to tell that story was the issue.

- Had a kid come to an on campus interview in workout shorts and a tshirt. We tried to give him the benefit of the doubt by asking "Do you have a class or activity to get to after this?" "No, why?" Did not hire.

- (Wasn't me but this is the best one). Guy sits down with a candidate and notices he has experience working for the state:

"So, I see you worked for the state for the last 10 years. Could you elaborate on what your position was"
"I was in prison"
"May I ask what for?"
"Oh, I murdered my wife."
 

BillBrasky4Cy

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I had been with my last company for 9 years befoire accepting a role at a new company a few months back and I was nervous as hell for my interview. I tend to do really well in interviews but man, if you haven't been through the process in a few years it is somewhat nerve wracking. I had been through several internal interviews at my old job but those were much more informal and laid back.

Going through the whole process made me realize how big of an advantage job hoppers have compared to "loyal" employees when it comes to interviewing. I have a friend who is a recruiter and she says the same thing.