This thread is weird.
I've lived in KC for 25 years. I have a sister that's lived in NKC, Liberty and now in Grain Valley. Another sister lives in Olathe. My SIL lived in some ****** areas in KCK. Good friends live in Waldo, Brookside, Belton, Overland Park and Parkville.
I live in Western Shawnee in one the original subdivisions west of 435. I miss the open spaces I originally lived in since I've seen a lot get built up around me over the years. However, my daughter is in middle school, walks to school, is safe and has good friends nearby. It's perfect for me right now. If I want to hit a concert, go to a brewery, a sporting event, an art exhibit or whatever, I'm there within half an hour. I really don't care if my house is boring to someone else. It doesn't define me. It holds my stuff just fine.
Every area has selling points and negatives when all is said and done. I've found everyone pretty much sticks to their own microcosm yet touts it like it's so much better than the next. In reality, while there are differences, they aren't as large as they appear. It still comes down to people. A good or bad neighbor can skew your perception.
I will say this, though. In terms of smoking a j: about any suburb in JOCO Kansas is put together with families and raising kids in mind. Smoking a joint on your front porch is probably going to generate a call to the police from someone. My BIL stayed with us for a year and we got a visit while he was lighting up one day.
IMO, the political talk is garbage. There are definitely areas of each, but it's much more mixed than people think. It's just people paying attention to the loudest voices and painting with a broad brush. It's rural KS and MO that keeps the states red.
Finally, the roads during the winter are well taken care of, and I can only think of maybe one or two times that I didn't feel safe hopping on an interstate, even during a crappy storm. Ice is more prevalent here than in Iowa, but they generally do a really good job getting in front of it. I find people drive worse in rain than snow.