Helicopter Parenting

[Sparkplug]

What advice do you have for freshman parents?

Students or former students- what did your parents do that you disliked. Get it off your chest here. We’re cheaper than a therapist

Been there. Just wondering what I should have known

 

[SECyclone]

Less you actually know the better

 

[Sigmapolis]

This thread has potential.

 

[BoxsterCy]

What advice do you have for freshman parents?

Been there. Just wondering what I should have known

You a freshman who is also a parent or the parent of a freshman?

 

[Sparkplug]

You a freshman who is also a parent or the parent of a freshman?

Answer either way. 32 years between being a freshman and being the parent of a freshman

If asking me, I was pretty hands off. Never moved him in and only moved him out after graduation

 

[somecyguy]

What advice do you have for freshman parents?

Been there. Just wondering what I should have known

As long as they are passing class and not visiting a police station, hospital or OBGYN office, things are good.

 

[CyCrazy]

My girls are young but I let them figure it out on there own. Meaning bumps, bruises, scrapes, etc. I dont baby them. They need to figure out their own limitations. My neighbor has to hover over her kids at all times its bizarre.

 

[cmjh10]

Make sure they dont come home for at least the first month. Weekends are when you meet the friends you have after college.

 

[Isualum13]

Helicopter parenting is better than lawn mower parenting. Although neither is any good.

 

[STATE12]

Helicopter parenting is better than lawn mower parenting. Although neither is any good.

Had to google that one. Whoa...

For anybody not familiar with this (new to me) term:
An anonymous member of the organization wrote in the essay that lawnmower parents mow down all of children's challenges, discomforts and struggles.

The teacher author shared a story of being called to the office, expecting to retrieve a student's forgotten meal money or inhaler. Instead, a sheepish parent in a suit was dropping off an expensive water bottle after repeated texts from a child. Water fountains exist all over the school. The poster's unspoken response: WHAT ON THIS ACTUAL EARTH.

 

[Sparkplug]

Helicopter parenting is better than lawn mower parenting. Although neither is any good.

Like the example of the lawnmower parent asking someone to blow on their child’s hot food

 

[J-Diggy]

Accept that you will be receiving information on a "need to know" basis only.

Agree with things like going to class, getting good grades, not getting arrested and not going broke the first semester being a minimum expectation for parents.

Weekends are key. No reason to come home and hang around the high school football game. Enjoy college, show up for the first tailgate a little hung over and have some fun.

 

[Cyclones_R_GR8]

Like the example of the lawnmower parent asking someone to blow on their child’s hot food

At this exact moment I can think of only one person I would actually allow to blow on my food to cool it. It's not some random stranger either.

 

[Sigmapolis]

I think my parents lost interest in my education when I was about 8.

 

[Colorado]

My wife jokes about going off to college with our daughter. I think she's only half kidding.

 

[coolerifyoudid]

I love it when people confuse helicopter parenting with parenting.

 

[jbindm]

Got my script ready (to be spoken loudly or shouted over the sounds of my sobbing wife).

"The car is loaded up. I put some emergency cash in the glovebox. Make good decisions. If you make a bad decision then don't compound it with another one. I love you and I don't want to see you back here until Thanksgiving. Good luck."

 

[BleedCycloneRed]

When I left for college, my dad helped me load up the last box in my car and told me "I have two things I would like you to remember....1) Whatever you do, be able to look in the mirror the next morning and be proud of it and 2) you get in a lot less trouble with your pants on then you will with your pants off." He then shook my hand and wished me good luck. Having attended ISU in the 70's when the legal drinking age was 18, we had plenty of opportunities to get into trouble. And we partied, drank to excess on too many occasions, and enjoyed our time. But graduated with an engineering degree in 4 years, followed by fathers advise, and hopefully make him proud of my accomplishments. And I following a similar approach when I sent my 3 kids off to college, and they also drank to excess too many times, enjoyed their time, graduated in 4 years, and all have excellent jobs today. Seems to be an approach that works in our family.

 

[Cyclone.TV]

My girls are young but I let them figure it out on there own. Meaning bumps, bruises, scrapes, etc. I dont baby them. They need to figure out their own limitations. My neighbor has to hover over her kids at all times its bizarre.

I hope your children are smarter than you are.

 

[Sigmapolis]

One thing I will comment quick...

I grew up in Boone and lived there/commuted to school my 5.5 years on campus, including all of undergraduate and 1.5 years to finish a quick M.A. before heading off.

I was 16 when I started college (though turning 17 my first or second week of classes). I did not move out from home until I was 22. There was a world of difference in my levels of physical and emotional maturity between those ages, and I am glad I had a chance to more gradually transition like that, as opposed to having to go live on my own immediately.

I never really had that "all at once" feeling of going off to college and living away from home at 17-18-19 like so many do. I am glad I did things my way... saved a ton of money... and I am not sure how ready I would have been to move many counties or even a state or a few states away from home at that point. It would have made college way different for me, at least.

My compliments to those who brave it.