"Turn the bleeping lights on. Can't see a damn thing in here."
The garage, the basement, the kitchen, the living room, wherever. 65 years later and the house is always lit up light a Christmas tree. He would chuck flashlights under a car I was working on even if I already had one.
"That wouldn't have happened if you were wearing your bleeping shoes."
I've definitely inherited that one. The wife insists on doing physical chores wearing flip flops. Constantly stubbing her toe, kicking something, dropping something on her foot. I wear shoes from the moment I get out of the shower in the morning until it's time to hit the sack.
Your dad wants to turn lights on??? My dad gets pissed if there are lights on in a room we aren't using. Heaven forbid you leave a refrigerator door open for more than ten seconds...
My father isn't much for words of wisdom, but one of his favorite sayings is, "**** rolls down hill."
He does shut them off when he goes to bed. Other than that, all lights on, all the time. How are you supposed to see what you're working on if you don't have any lights on? I could have baked cookies under the lights in our garage. We had lights hanging from other lights. Our barn was about ready to fall down (and since has crumbled and been destroyed), had virtually nothing inside that was of use, but had 10,000 watts of light bulbs strung up. Not sure how it didn't burn down.
Is your dad Clark Griswold?
He would look around at the other cars/drivers and ask, "Why don't some of these people just STAY HOME?!?!"
My dad made a similar comment when we were trying to find a space at a busy parking lot. "Why are all these people shopping on a day like this?"
Another of his parking-lot go-to's (I still frequently use this quip). "Remember, we're parked next to that blue van."
Your dad wants to turn lights on??? My dad gets pissed if there are lights on in a room we aren't using. Heaven forbid you leave a refrigerator door open for more than ten seconds...
My father isn't much for words of wisdom, but one of his favorite sayings is, "**** rolls down hill."
I gotta say, more than any other user on this forum, your posts make me laugh. I'd say you've done your dad proud more often than not when it comes to this."If I laughed and made someone else laugh, then I had a good day" - my favorite thing he ever taught me