What should I do?

[Knownothing]

I have a kid on my 9-10 year old baseball team. She really has no business playing baseball. She can't catch the ball. She can't throw the ball. She can't hit. She ask me the other day where second base was (this is after a full month and a half of practice). I am affraid she is going to get hurt. She does not want to be there at all. She asks me if she has to play. I have to play her 2 innings a game. Her father almosts acts clueless to the whole situation. He said she looks improved. There is really nothing I can do to make her better. She still can't figure out how to catch and she honestly has no idea what is going on around her. She ask me if she won the last game. I am confused that her father can't see that this is killing his daughters self confidence in herself. The other kids on the team are getting more upset with her as the season goes on.
My question is this. Should I tell her dad the I think he should pull her from the team and practice the rest of the summer playing softball and get her ready for next year?
Should I just leave it alone and pray that she don't get drilled in the face with a baseball. My other coach is concerened as well.

 

[JP4CY]

Tell pops to yank her. Tell him maybe she'd be better at swimming, something that takes up time in the summer.

 

[TheHelgo]

sounds like she is being forced to play. i would approach the father and diplomatically let him know that his daughter has expressed a desire not wanting to play anymore.

 

[TheHelgo]

sounds like she is being forced to play. i would approach the father and diplomatically let him know that his daughter has expressed a desire not wanting to play anymore.

As a side note, my wife was strong-armed into playing softball and soccer as a youth against her wishes - she really wanted to take ballet and stuff like that. She has never really gotten over it and holds a bit of a grudge against her parents for it.

 

[Stewo]

Isn't there a softball league for young ladies in your area? It seems a bit odd to have a female playing baseball?

 

[Knownothing]

I don't even have a problem with a girl playing baseball. However there are softball places she should be playing. We used to have this girl that was on a different team when I was younger. She could hold her own.

 

[Ms3r4ISU]

What do you know about her and her family? Or, what can you find out? If she's actually asking what you indicated, it seems that perhaps there's more than just a physical inability here. That alone needs individual attention.

 

[Knownothing]

Yeah I am just a coach. Last game we played we had the bases load with 1 out. She was on 3rd because she won't swing the bat and the kid walked her. Our guy hit the ball to the fence and she stopped before she touched home plate and just stood there. The kid on second rounded 3rd and ran around her because she would not touch home. So basically they both were out. Cost our team the game. She said she did not know why she did not touch home plate. Her dad walked up to me after the game and said he thought his daughter had touched home plate. I clearly saw her not step on home. I did not even argue with the ump about it. It's really frustrating for our other players. It's frustrating for our coaches and other parents. It made her cry and I felt bad for her.

 

[Cyclonestate78]

Yeah I am just a coach. Last game we played we had the bases load with 1 out. She was on 3rd because she won't swing the bat and the kid walked her. Our guy hit the ball to the fence and she stopped before she touched home plate and just stood there. The kid on second rounded 3rd and ran around her because she would not touch home. So basically they both were out. Cost our team the game. She said she did not know why she did not touch home plate. Her dad walked up to me after the game and said he thought his daughter had touched home plate. I clearly saw her not step on home. I did not even argue with the ump about it. It's really frustrating for our other players. It's frustrating for our coaches and other parents. It made her cry and I felt bad for her.

This is a situation that has to be addressed. Youth sports are excellent for building character, self esteem, decision making skills, and they keep kids active. The game only has those great benefits when the kids involved want to be there and they understand the game they are playing. How can she be having any fun when she doesn't seem to know anything about baseball or have the basic skills to play the game? It is time to have a little meeting with the father and explain to him that you love having her on the team but she just lacks the fundamental abilities and the desire to enjoy the game at this point in time. See if you can find some information on a local clinic or something to offer him as an opportunity to help her learn the game before she comes back out.

 

[jay moe]

I would recommend to her parents that you are concerned about her safety. Tell them to consider placing her in a softball league, it has been my experience that girls at that age aren't quite as developed skill wise when it comes to playing ball. Explain that she might have a better time and enjoy herself if she were playing with girls her own age.

 

[garn91]

the joys of youth sports and why I want nothing to do with it.

 

[sunset]

If she truly doesn't want to be there, then she shouldn't be forced and you should talk to her Father so he can probe to find out her wishes. If she does want to be there, it's your job to find ways to teach her. Youth sports is about having fun and learning the fundamentals. Coaching youth sports is about making sure the kids are enjoying themselves and learning something, regardless of their skill or knowledge level.

 

[Cyclonepride]

Has she indicated whether she wants to play or not? Some kids are clueless, but still have a ball doing it. I would address it to the parents from a safety standpoint, because if she isn't aware of her surroundings, she could certainly get hurt.

Perhaps the parents could work on her awareness and where she should be focusing, assuming that she really wants to play?

 

[Knownothing]

If she truly doesn't want to be there, then she shouldn't be forced and you should talk to her Father so he can probe to find out her wishes. If she does want to be there, it's your job to find ways to teach her. Youth sports is about having fun and learning the fundamentals. Coaching youth sports is about making sure the kids are enjoying themselves and learning something, regardless of their skill or knowledge level.

Teaching her baseball would be like teaching me rocket science. It's impossible. We worked with her for 2 weeks trying to teach her how to catch a ball. She still can't do it. I have to teach my team basic double play's and situation baseball. I can't concentrate on teaching her how to catch a baseball. At this point in the season it's teaching them how double plays, flyballs and such. Not how to catch. I am trying to get them to do normal baseball things. I can't ignore the whole team to teach absolute basics. I have to teach the team how to play and baseball awareness on what to do if a kid is on third and first and what base I want the ball thrown to.
I think I am going to have a talk with the dad. Who as you would know happens to be a *****. He also told me on the phone when I told him she was going to be on my team that her daughter could hang with any boy in that league. Even though we watched her in tryouts and she was the last draft choice.

 

[Wesley]

I have a kid on my 9-10 year old baseball team. She really has no business playing baseball. She can't catch the ball. She can't throw the ball. She can't hit. She ask me the other day where second base was (this is after a full month and a half of practice). I am affraid she is going to get hurt. She does not want to be there at all. She asks me if she has to play. I have to play her 2 innings a game. Her father almosts acts clueless to the whole situation. He said she looks improved. There is really nothing I can do to make her better. She still can't figure out how to catch and she honestly has no idea what is going on around her. She ask me if she won the last game. I am confused that her father can't see that this is killing his daughters self confidence in herself. The other kids on the team are getting more upset with her as the season goes on.
My question is this. Should I tell her dad the I think he should pull her from the team and practice the rest of the summer playing softball and get her ready for next year?
Should I just leave it alone and pray that she don't get drilled in the face with a baseball. My other coach is concerened as well.

Make her an assistant coach. She can be third base coach.

 

[dmclone]

Guaranteed that he is going to make you look like an *** but you're in the right on this one.

 

[Wesley]

As a side note, my wife was strong-armed into playing softball and soccer as a youth against her wishes - she really wanted to take ballet and stuff like that. She has never really gotten over it and holds a bit of a grudge against her parents for it.

Tell your wife to grow up and that she can take ballet now. Think of Buzz Aldrin on Dancing with the Stars.

 

[tccoach]

I would have a talk with both dad (mom?) and your player together...share you concerns about her safety because of her skill level, and share you concern about her expressed desire to not want to play and see what they say...Just curious at 8-9 years old, did she play last season? or is this her first season? If she and her parents want her to play then I would find someone (dad?) maybe to work on her basic skills at practice each day, almost like a separate practice for her so she can learn how to play...catch...throw. Encourage parents to practice with her at home and at this age hope for the best. The pressure to play thing is kind of touchy at this age because sometimes kids can decide against an activity without really giving much of a try, when in a year or two they might be good at it, so maybe some parent encouragement to play is not such a bad thing.

 

[sunset]

Teaching her baseball would be like teaching me rocket science. It's impossible. We worked with her for 2 weeks trying to teach her how to catch a ball. She still can't do it. I have to teach my team basic double play's and situation baseball. I can't concentrate on teaching her how to catch a baseball. At this point in the season it's teaching them how double plays, flyballs and such. Not how to catch. I am trying to get them to do normal baseball things. I can't ignore the whole team to teach absolute basics. I have to teach the team how to play and baseball awareness on what to do if a kid is on third and first and what base I want the ball thrown to.
I think I am going to have a talk with the dad. Who as you would know happens to be a *****. He also told me on the phone when I told him she was going to be on my team that her daughter could hang with any boy in that league. Even though we watched her in tryouts and she was the last draft choice.

Maybe I don't understand your league, perhaps it is set up for more advanced players. I don't want to get in an argument on this. All I can say is that coaches teach players, especially with this age group. If you say you can't teach a 9 year old that wants to learn, then I would question why I am there if I were you. As I said earlier, if she doesn't want to be there then it's a different situation. I played baseball at a very high level and I can tell you that the most important thing with youth baseball is to learn the fundamentals and have fun. What is more fundamental than learning how to throw (a real skill that isn't taught by most youth coaches) and learning the basic rules? That is why coaches are so important in youth sports, you set the playing field for both learning and having fun.

I guarantee that I am in the top 10% of the population when it comes to competitiveness. But when it comes to 9 yr olds, there are much more important things than winning and losing.

 

[BKLYNCyclone]

Give her a clipboard and teach her out to do the stats...

In all seriousness, it does matter whether or not there are alternatives. Most bigger communities have leagues that are not only age based, but skill based. If this is the only baseball team and there is no softball team, you might be out of luck. I'd find an alternative for the parents and give them an easy out. They'll fight you tooth and nail if you don't have an alternative activity that is in her best interests to propose. However, no matter what, the parent's are probably going to resent you for telling them their daughter isn't good enough... (at least that is what they will hear, no matter what you actually say.) Remember, you want to find something as an alternative that is in the girl's best interest.