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  1. #1
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    A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    Usually I could care less about what people write about, that is until now. A Journalist at Missouri wrote this article about funding cuts last week. It has made a lot of my friends and I mad and have already sent a few emails off to the paper. Please tell me what you all think.

    The article:
    Friesen: 'I can service a horse.'
    By Dan Friesen, Columnist; Dfriesen@themaneater.com. Posted February 27, 2007.
    This weekend, I learned that there are going to be some changes in funding for a few departments at the university, and I must say I couldn’t be happier.

    Money and funding is the university’s way of telling groups and departments exactly where they stand. You want to know how important you are? Find out how much money you’re getting, there’s your answer.

    I recently found out that I am not making the $10,000 per semester I demanded after Winter Semester 2006 but am in fact still making exactly what Lacey Hanson made semesters ago: $10 a week. And she didn’t even go in for rounds of negotiations like I did.

    Maybe I’m closed-minded, but I think that some majors and paths of study are more, dare I say, noble than others.

    You know what I mean. People with certain specializations, like journalism or textile and apparel management, can do more to improve society than others.

    That’s why I was glad to read in Friday’s issue of this rag that not only was $1.6 million in federal money cut from the agriculture school budget, but $1.4 million was also added to the journalism school’s budget for construction.

    Now, I know a lot of you out there are saying, “But Dan, you’re totally biased. You’re a journalist, therefore your opinion on the matter isn’t pure.” Hogwash, I say. The fact that I, Dan Friesen, am a journalist really serves to prove my argument.

    Plus, we all know that “bias” is just a buzzword thrown around by the liberal, secular progressive media establishment to bork rational, right-thinking Supreme Court appointees who happen to think that fetuses are people and gays aren’t.

    You see, one of the things I’ve learned over the years is that the print media is the most powerful and influential force in the free world. What we do is tell the world what’s going on. We observe things and we write about them, so all the busy people in the world don’t have to find things out for themselves. We tell the truth to the masses.

    Seriously, what do you agriculture people do? Drive a plow and jerk off livestock? Yeah, real important. I assure you, I can drive stick, and if the situation came to it, I could service a horse.

    Can you farmers dig through all the daily events and weave a coherent yarn explaining why any of it matters? No way. I’ve read the papers that come out of the country. They have headlines like “O’Flannigan Cow Farts.”

    Nice try. Tell you what: You stick to the bovine handjobs, we’ll stick to the important work of print.

    We aspire to live in big cities, writing for important, high-social impact papers. You aspire to spread manure for a living.

    We pass the time playing Scrabble or Taboo to expand our minds. You play horseshoes. We like a nice classy scotch after a long day’s work. You drink bathtub gin.

    We need fancy equipment to ensure a good layout. We need everything to be state-of-the-art. There’s not a piece of farm equipment on this Earth that isn’t covered in rust.

    We need, and let’s not forget deserve, the increased funding. We’re making a difference. We’re important.

    Now, how am I going to wet my beak in that $1.4 million? Stokes, time for another round of negotiations.



  2. #2
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    redrocker's Avatar
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    Are you sure the guy is not from California? Has to be a joke, NOBODY is that stupid?



    2009 FLHR - Vivid Black


    I don't sweat the petty things,... I pet the sweaty things

  3. #3
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    Wow. I was going to suggest that this was satire, but I don't think it is. This author sounds like one of "those" kids.... you know, a rich preppy frat boy who came from a suburb of Chicago, spent his whole childhood playing soccer and still calls mommy every day to tell her that he finally learned how to use a dishwasher. I would like to see the link to this story to see the feedback it is getting on its website.

    BTW....I doubt this kid graduates from his journalism school. I'm no journalistic type of person (civil engineer) but that was poorly written.



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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture


  5. #5
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    Eeesh, I am a Finance Major and even I am offended.


    --Luck of the Cyrish--






  6. #6
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    This dude deserves a kick to the face, nuts, ***, and chest. Or whatever my foot can connect with.



  7. #7
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    You mean a kick to the vagina.



  8. #8
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    I hate the press.........yellow journalism is the the standard rather than the exception these days. This is another example of the press' desire to become the news rather than reporting it. He is entitled to his opinion.......however the fact that he considers his self-indulgent meanderings print-worthly makes me sick.



  9. #9
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    Quote Originally Posted by ia8manfan View Post
    This author sounds like one of "those" kids.... you know, a rich preppy frat boy who came from a suburb of Chicago,
    Now you may accuse me of making this up, but trust me, I'm not. One of "those" kids from a Chi town suburb who lived in my dorm said the following after his initial trip to Ames: "Man, they grow short fat horses in Iowa."
    He was then informed that he had been looking at cows and not horses. I kid you not.



  10. #10
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    Sounds like an Ag student at his school stole his girlfriend. He sure talks a lot about Bovine hand jobs also as it sounds like another fascination the author has. Can anyone on a farm set it up for this guy to come to Iowa and fulfill his fantasy?


    “Also, I met a lot of Iowa State fans and I don’t want to leave any of that behind.” - DARIUS DARKS on Staying a CLONE!!!


    Matt (00 Alumn)
    Waukee, Iowa

  11. #11
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    I was just e-mailed this and all I can say is wow. I hope the next time this d-bag sits down to eat he realizes that if it wasn't for agriculture he would have an empty plate. I bet this guy walks around with his finger up his butt and beret on his head. I'm speechless, this is just ridiculous. What an effing d-bag.



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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    What a fool! I wonder if the idiot even realizes when he sits down in his fancy restaurant where his food comes from?



  13. #13
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    My degree is in Ag.
    My question is, would the world last longer without print media or without food?
    I'm surprised he didn't have a nascar slam in that article. (Had to throw that in there brinahos)


    I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.

  14. #14
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    Quote Originally Posted by CY ST8T View Post
    Sounds like an Ag student at his school stole his girlfriend. He sure talks a lot about Bovine hand jobs also as it sounds like another fascination the author has. Can anyone on a farm set it up for this guy to come to Iowa and fulfill his fantasy?
    I would be more than willing to accommodate this d-bag. While he's stroking off one of our steers, he can explain to my Dad, Uncle, and Grandpa how they wasted their entire lives putting food in his mouth.


    Last edited by CyForPresident; 03-09-2007 at 12:18 PM.

  15. #15
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    Re: A Slap in the Face for Agriculture

    The guy is an idiot trying to be funny. Don't give him any more of your time. That's how these morons become stories, they write crap and gets a reaction that in turn gives them credibility among other idiots. Don't give him credibility! Ignore it and move on...That is the best way to respond to media that you do not agree with. If no one talks about what you wrote then you will not be writing for very long.


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