Results 1 to 3 of 3
  1. #1
    Legend
    Points: 287,984, Level: 100
    Level completed: 0%, Points required for next Level: 0
    Overall activity: 12.0%
    Achievements:
    VeteranCreated Album pictures50000 Experience Points
    CloneAggie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    14,854
    Points
    287,984
    Level
    100
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0

    Study on Children Tenting in the Yard

    I encourage you parents to read this to your kids when they want to camp out.

    Study: 74% Of Children Tenting Out In Yard Don't Make It Through The Night | The Onion - America's Finest News Source
    Although Fredericks claimed that the odds of an unsuspecting child surviving until morning were slim, he did issue a list of warning signs to watch for. The sound of a nearby twig snapping, Fredericks said, almost always indicates that a half-man, half-lizard swamp creature, who feeds on the organs of schoolchildren while they're still alive, is on the prowl. In addition, the study found that turning off one's flashlight or closing one's eyes for "even a second" is an open invitation to all disfigured hitchhikers in the area to suddenly attack.

    "Children should know, however, that if they hear scratching on the side of their tent, it's probably just their older brother trying to scare them," Fredericks said. "And if the scratching suddenly stops, it's most likely because their parents have gone insane and crept up from behind with this really demonic look in their eyes and slit his throat."


    Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. ~ George Carlin

    There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life:
    The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves Orcs. ~ John Rogers

  2. #2
    Rookie
    Points: 10,589, Level: 31
    Level completed: 6%, Points required for next Level: 661
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    SocialVeteran10000 Experience Points
    ktoddcyclones's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Columbus Junction, IA
    Posts
    516
    Points
    10,589
    Level
    31
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 0
    Given: 0

    Re: Study on Children Tenting in the Yard

    My sister never made it through the night when we told her that a coyote would come and eat her. Other than that my brothers and I made it through every night we slept in the tent


    "Whoever said it doesn't matter if you win or lose probably lost."

  3. #3
    Pro
    Points: 71,062, Level: 82
    Level completed: 78%, Points required for next Level: 388
    Overall activity: 12.0%
    Achievements:
    Veteran50000 Experience Points
    Cyclones_R_GR8's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Omaha
    Posts
    3,459
    Points
    71,062
    Level
    82
    Thumbs Up
    Received: 257
    Given: 504

    Re: Study on Children Tenting in the Yard

    Always love "The Onion"
    We slept in the back yard when we were extremely young. Once we hit about 12 we started camping in the 80 acre pasture behind our property, or the 100 acre pasture down the road. Of course we never slept much. Stayed up all night cooking hot dogs/burgers walking all over the place. Now those places are all developments.
    Funny thing is this one guy who worked with my dad and had moved there from New York city told my dad he found an old indian camp site on his property. My dad didn't have the heart to tell him it was made by the little savages he raised.



Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
  • TV: TBD
  • Iowa State vs. Oklahoma
  • November 1, 2014
  • 07:00 PM