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  1. #16
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by ArgentCy View Post
    I think that her therapist is terrible and just milking as much money as they can from her. I think they both probably have issues but it almost certainly isn't going to end well.
    Honestly, the way that scenario should have gone, IMO, is like this:

    - Husband sees qualified therapist separately, and couple goes. They talk out the actual issues.
    - Wife makes it clear what her limits are, and expectations.
    - If those aren't met, a trial separation (in this case, it sounds like he was avoiding the family to watch porn) followed by divorce, if necessary.

    You treat your spouse like an adult, and you make your own adult limits known. You definitely don't babysit someone - and what therapist thinks that's healthy??


    M 7/09

    Quote Originally Posted by Firefighter4Cy View Post
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  2. #17
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Female strip clubs = ok. Male strip clubs = cheating. Not a double standard, just watch some shows / movies / youtube / whatever, male strip clubs seem to go way over the top.

    Not saying that doesn't happen at female, but I would not be comfortable with my wife going to a male club.

    and porn.......porn is good



  3. #18
    Hooper drives the boat, Chief
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by RubyClone View Post
    Uhhhh....

    Nope, not me. Angie and I are in a good place with this. I promise to confine it to the garage. She promises to keep the fridge fully stocked with crudite platters and not question how I'm using them. Everybody wins.


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  4. #19
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Angie View Post
    I was just reading an article about a husband with an online porn addiction, and how the wife put blockers on all of their WiFi and everything because she and their therapist saw it as cheating.

    Do you find porn to be cheating? What about strip clubs? What if they're in moderation vs. excessiveness? What IS excessive?
    In response to the first part of what you shared, really ANYTHING could be "cheating" or a barrier to intimacy. If the same dude was always at sporting events, on CF, watching sports in a separate room and the core was THAT was his source of enjoyment and he neglected his wife, then that could be the core issue (intimacy, not sports). Like any type of addiction or barrier, sometimes removing it as an option is one way...i.e. if someone struggles with alcohol, hanging out at a bar is not probably the best place to be and having alcohol in the home is asking for something to happen.

    There certainly is a value judgement on porn/strip clubs as well. Some argue 'it's the woman's body' but would probably not say that if their daughter was making that choice (i.e it's ok for MY pleasure, but I won't worry about the person who may have been abused or has no direction).



  5. #20
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    This thread is disappoint



  6. #21
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    IMO yes if your significant other is bothered or not on board with what your intentions are. Just watched to get some ideas and he/she doesn't care fine. Start pleasuring yourself, no. Going to the club with a group and they don't care too much, fine. Get a private session is probably over the line.

    Once it is passes from "damn she is hot" to "I gotta get my hands on that" is where the issues start.



  7. #22
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    I could definitely see a problem with the physical aspect of a strip club but porn shouldn't be a problem unless it's taking away from the bedroom.



  8. #23
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by ISUKing View Post
    Female strip clubs = ok. Male strip clubs = cheating. Not a double standard, just watch some shows / movies / youtube / whatever, male strip clubs seem to go way over the top.

    Not saying that doesn't happen at female, but I would not be comfortable with my wife going to a male club.

    and porn.......porn is good
    Is that first paragraph missing a jimlad? If not, never having been to a male strip club, I guess I need more detail on why they're over the top.



  9. #24
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Doc View Post
    Is that first paragraph missing a jimlad? If not, never having been to a male strip club, I guess I need more detail on why they're over the top.
    For research purposes only of course.



  10. #25
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    I enjoy both. /End thread



  11. #26
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    It isn't missing a jimlad, but I haven't actually been to a male club, so I am definitely making assumptions from TV/Movies but every-time I have seen a male club portrayed, or even heard stories from people who have gone, it seems like they are just 1 step below public sex



  12. #27
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by CapnCy View Post

    There certainly is a value judgement on porn/strip clubs as well. Some argue 'it's the woman's body' but would probably not say that if their daughter was making that choice (i.e it's ok for MY pleasure, but I won't worry about the person who may have been abused or has no direction).
    If you look at things from any sort of wider lens, strip clubs tend to be a whole lot less fun as you have a daughter who is starting to grow up. The same goes for ogling college co-eds when your own daughter starts to approach that age. Frankly, I don't know how some old rich guys do it with their young trophy wives that are the same age or younger than their own daughters.


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  13. #28
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by VeloClone View Post
    If you look at things from any sort of wider lens, strip clubs tend to be a whole lot less fun as you have a daughter who start to grow up. The same goes for ogling college co-eds when your own daughter starts to approach that age. Frankly, I don't know how some old rich guys do it with their young trophy wives that are the same age or younger than their own daughters.

    Well now that you talked about it, its in my head. Thanks a lot.



  14. #29
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    I don't think I can say anything in this thread after seeing grooming comments removed from the shaving topic.



  15. #30
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    Re: Friday OT #2 - Porn and Strip Clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by bos View Post
    Well now that you talked about it, its in my head. Thanks a lot.
    What was that therapist getting?

    "That'll be $350, bos, and I'll see you next week.


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