Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money? - Page 4

View Poll Results: Joint money or separate money?

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  • Joint Money

    144 79.12%
  • Separate money

    38 20.88%
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  1. #46
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Seperate, and it's not about not wanting to be ONE but more about not breathing down the other person's neck when they want something.
    I threw my wife a surprise birthday party a couple months ago that did cost a significant amount. She would have known about it for months if we had a joint account, and the surprise was amazing.



  2. #47
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    We're friends with a couple that keep separate accounts. Their argument is that he's self-employed (workforce of one), so taxes are easier. It's annoying to my husband and me, though, when we go out with them, and it's who paid last time, and how much, etc. etc. Then the wife is miffed (that's just her personality)

    I don't understand "big" separate accounts. To quote Dave Ramsey, the traditional ending of a wedding ceremony is NOT "I now pronounce you a joint venture."


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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Quote Originally Posted by SaraV View Post
    We're friends with a couple that keep separate accounts. Their argument is that he's self-employed (workforce of one), so taxes are easier. It's annoying to my husband and me, though, when we go out with them, and it's who paid last time, and how much, etc. etc. Then the wife is miffed (that's just her personality)

    I don't understand "big" separate accounts. To quote Dave Ramsey, the traditional ending of a wedding ceremony is NOT "I now pronounce you a joint venture."

    yeah that would be annoying. I guess I can understand something small like $75 a month (or whatever amount is deemed ok) for personal stuff if you really want to do that. I can only see how much my husband spends on his credit card a month, not the actual transactions. So if he wanted to hide a gift or something in there, that would be pretty easy. But having to completely split all your bills is too much work for me! It was a pain planning our wedding and always having to ask my husband how much was in his account, if he would have enough to pay for this or that.


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  4. #49
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    I think it makes sense for farmers to keep it separate and jobs that don't have "normal" pay schedules. But if both husband and wife have direct deposits from work that are on regular basis than it doesn't make much sense to have them separate.



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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    We go the separate route and it works great for us. Neither one of us want a joint account. If she wants to spend money on a new handbag or shoes, she can without checking with me first and if I want to buy a sweet new compound miter saw for the garage, I can do it without checking with her.

    We own a business together and we make the same amount of money, so it works for us. We split the bills around home evenly.

    I am surprised how many on here are opinionated and look down on couples going the separate bank account route like it is not really being married or just like roommates.

    I have had several friends that were married with the joint account approach that ran into problems. One spouse trusted the other with being the "family bookkeeper" only to find out the family finances were not being handled by the "family bookkeeper" in the way that had been verbally agreed upon by both. Major problems followed.


    Last edited by SwirlingFloater; 07-21-2013 at 07:39 PM.

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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    We also have couple friends that do the joint account where the husband by far has the larger income, but the wife keeps the checkbook in her purse. The husband has to ask the wife for allowance or money to buy something he wants. (No matter how small the item)

    Seems that the wife has a little more than the family checkbook stuffed in that purse.



  7. #52
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Quote Originally Posted by SwirlingFloater View Post
    We also have couple friends that do the joint account where the husband by far has the larger income, but the wife keeps the checkbook in her purse. The husband has to ask the wife for allowance or money to buy something he wants. (No matter how small the item)

    Seems that the wife has a little more than the family checkbook stuffed in that purse.
    He doesn't carry a credit card?



  8. #53
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    When we got engaged - we created a separate account that each of us put money into for the wedding. It was a great way of out-of-sight-out-of-mind saving for the wedding since we basically paid for almost all of it.

    After the wedding - we didn't know what to do with the account and had planned to close it. Another couple we know recommended this - we did it and it works awesome.

    She has her account and I have mine - we each of course have access to the other's account. The other account is for all of our bills (mortgage, cars, utilities, etc). Works awesome. We never got wrapped up in who put how much in the account. Generally she pays for all groceries and I pay for most of our entiernainmet items and travel.

    We almost never argue about money.



  9. #54
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Quote Originally Posted by isuno1fan View Post
    The people that have separate accounts because they act like it is their own money that way and they won't have money arguments realize it is all actually shared money because you are married right? Might as well put it in a single account. I don't understand the mind game you are playing with yourself by keeping it separate. Makes things way, WAY harder. Seems silly.
    No need to bust on those of us who keep our accounts separate, we're not busting on you for wanting to pour all the household income into one account and then dole it out. It is actually very, very simple.

    The wife has her CC accounts, I have my CC accounts, and we both pay them down to $0 each month. I don't have to worry about accidentally paying hers late. I take care of all the house related bills and just have her pay me back separately at a later date (usually every 4-6 months). I don't have to worry about her accidentally making a house related payment late. She also has her own car loan, my vehicles are free and clear.

    What could be simpler? And it definitely isn't silly.



  10. #55
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Quote Originally Posted by ISUAlum2002 View Post
    No need to bust on those of us who keep our accounts separate, we're not busting on you for wanting to pour all the household income into one account and then dole it out. It is actually very, very simple.

    The wife has her CC accounts, I have my CC accounts, and we both pay them down to $0 each month. I don't have to worry about accidentally paying hers late. I take care of all the house related bills and just have her pay me back separately at a later date (usually every 4-6 months). I don't have to worry about her accidentally making a house related payment late. She also has her own car loan, my vehicles are free and clear.

    What could be simpler? And it definitely isn't silly.
    A joint account w/ no credit cards and auto bill pay?



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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Quote Originally Posted by ianoconnor View Post
    A joint account w/ no credit cards and auto bill pay?
    Ha. No way I would live my life without credit cards. There are so many CC companies to take advantage of, if you use their systems and offers the right way!

    And I loathe auto bill pay.



  12. #57
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Quote Originally Posted by ISUAlum2002 View Post
    No need to bust on those of us who keep our accounts separate, we're not busting on you for wanting to pour all the household income into one account and then dole it out. It is actually very, very simple.

    The wife has her CC accounts, I have my CC accounts, and we both pay them down to $0 each month. I don't have to worry about accidentally paying hers late. I take care of all the house related bills and just have her pay me back separately at a later date (usually every 4-6 months). I don't have to worry about her accidentally making a house related payment late. She also has her own car loan, my vehicles are free and clear.

    What could be simpler? And it definitely isn't silly.
    That seems kinda silly that you create another transaction. To each their own.



  13. #58
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    Where does her money come from to begin with? She shouldn't get paid to cook and do the housework.


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  14. #59
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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    My first marriage I had a lockdown joint account. I felt like a teenager asking for dad for $20 whenever I wanted some cash. Ended up being one of the many problems. Second time around I have a joint account where the bill money goes and a separate account for each of us for our personal fun/toy/junk purchases. There are a lot less arguments about money this time around. I had good friend around the same time that had the same kind of joint account with his first wife. It ended up being the cause of their divorce also.


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    Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

    I don't understand why you have to "ask" for money if you have a joint account? Do you guys not carry credit cards or ATM cards? Go get your own cash or buy what you want with your credit card. That's the same as having a separate account without the hassle of an actual separate account.



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