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  1. #1
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    Big XII Question

    Just received this from a relative in Missouri.





    Question: How many Big 12 students does it take to change a light bulb?

    At MISSOURI, it takes two: one to change the bulb and one more to explain how they did it every bit as good as the bulbs changed at BIG TEN schools.

    At TEXAS TECH, it takes two: one to change the bulb and one to phone an engineer at TEXAS A&M for instructions.

    At COLORADO, it takes four: one to screw in the bulb and three to figure out how to get stoned off the old one.

    At OKLAHOMA, it takes five: one to change it, three to reminisce about how Bud and Barry would have done it, and one to throw the old bulb at an NCAA investigator.

    At TEXAS A&M, it takes 12 (of course): one to change it, one to choreograph the homoerotic and utterly baffling chant/dance, one to stand as armed guard over the floor rug, 3 to do some weird pantomime/hand jive thing, one to sing about the experience, and five to march in place.

    At OKLAHOMA STATE, it takes seven, and each one gets credit for five semester hours.

    At KANSAS, it takes eight: one to screw it in and seven to discuss how much brighter it seems to shine during basketball season.

    At TEXAS, it takes ten: two to figure out how to screw it in, two to buy an orange lampshade, and six to phone a radio call-in show and talk about how much they hate OKLAHOMA.

    At IOWA STATE, it takes fifteen: one to screw in the bulb, two to buy the Skoal, and twelve to explain that Ames, Iowa really doesn't suck as bad as you'd think.

    At KANSAS STATE, it takes one hundred: one to change it, forty-nine to talk about how they did it better than at OKLAHOMA, and fifty to get drunk and pretend they have tradition when finished.

    At BAYLOR, it takes 40,000: one to screw it in and 39,999 to discuss how this finally will be the year that they have a decent football team.

    At NEBRASKA: None. There is no electricity in Nebraska.



  2. #2
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    Re: Big XII Question

    This is priceless!!!


    Chuck Lidell: I paint my toenails with pink and black polish. Problem is, I get more paint on my toes and on the carpet than on my nails. Any advice?
    Maria Sharapova: Don't you beat up other guys for a living? I don't know how to answer this.



  3. #3
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    Re: Big XII Question

    Ha, I like the last one the best. Thanks for sharing!



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    Re: Big XII Question

    But the thing is, Ames, IA DOESN'T suck as bad as you would think...



    Chuck Lidell: I paint my toenails with pink and black polish. Problem is, I get more paint on my toes and on the carpet than on my nails. Any advice?
    Maria Sharapova: Don't you beat up other guys for a living? I don't know how to answer this.



  5. #5
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    Re: Big XII Question

    There's one that's almost the same as this for the SEC too... but i like the specifics...the KSU one is almost perfectly right...


    Vitte, Dulcedo, Sipes

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