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  1. #1
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    Why Utah has so much speed

    I finally figured out where Utah's speed comes from. Its all in their religion. Utah is a Morman state. Mormans have many wives which is equal to many moms for the kids. They screw up or mouth off as kids at home, not only do they need to outrun one mom to avoid a beating, they need to outrun maybe 5, 6, 7, or more moms. That breeds speed!

    Plus I hear they wear magic underwear.


    Last edited by VTXCyRyD; 10-11-2010 at 09:45 AM. Reason: poor spelling, among other things

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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    I think the magic underwear definitely played a role.



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    You really think a guy named Shaky is Morman?


    Last edited by kgreeny; 10-11-2010 at 11:09 AM.


    "I believe the state color for Alabama should be primer," Larry the Cable Guy.

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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    I would like to hear more about how 'Morman'-ism 'breads' speed...



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    Quote Originally Posted by kgreeny View Post
    You really think a guy named Shacky is Morman?
    His dad may not be a practicing Morman, but I bet he's had a few women besides for Shacky's mom. (I don't know, just a guess)



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    Quote Originally Posted by edr247 View Post
    I would like to hear more about how 'Morman'-ism 'breads' speed...
    LOL, I'll fix that for you



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    It's a little known fact that Joseph Smith ran a 4.2 forty.



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    Quote Originally Posted by VTXCyRyD View Post
    I finally figured out where Utah's speed comes from. Its all in their religion. Utah is a Morman state. Mormans have many wives which is equal to many moms for the kids. They screw up or mouth off as kids at home, not only do they need to outrun one mom to avoid a beating, they need to outrun maybe 5, 6, 7, or more moms. That breeds speed!

    Plus I hear they wear magic underwear.
    Jimmie the Greek is that you?



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    What's a Morman?

    I know there is a religion called Mormonism.



  10. #10
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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    Quote Originally Posted by VTXCyRyD View Post
    I finally figured out where Utah's speed comes from. Its all in their religion. Utah is a Morman state. Mormans have many wives which is equal to many moms for the kids. They screw up or mouth off as kids at home, not only do they need to outrun one mom to avoid a beating, they need to outrun maybe 5, 6, 7, or more moms. That breeds speed!

    Plus I hear they wear magic underwear.




  11. #11
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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    It is the special Mormon Crusader Shoes. Forest Gumpish like.


    Let my Fred's Posse Ride: Georges, 3sus Naz, Dustin, Bryce, Abdel, Monte, Matt, and Jameel.

  12. #12
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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    This was just a theory, I honestly don't know much about the Morman religion, let alone how to spell it. Most of what I know about Mormons I learned from South Park.



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    Quote Originally Posted by cycopath25 View Post
    This thread has to be better than the "lets change our mascot" thread



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    Quote Originally Posted by VTXCyRyD View Post
    This thread has to be better than the "lets change our mascot" thread
    Don't flatter yourself.



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    Re: Why Utah has so much speed

    its a week late - but anyone that is laughing at this thread would appreciate this ... be sure to check the comments - Mormons getting mad on the internet

    University of Utah: A (Mostly) Accurate History



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